-Strictly Restricted - SIN BOUNDARY - Strictly Restricted-

2004-08-21T14:21:00.000+08:00

i like 3 songs very much so i decided to share with u all loh !! the lyrics very meaningful..sort of describing my situation also loh !! they are ai qing yu wei by zhang xin zhe...gei ni zhen ge shi jie by zhang shan wei and gu dan ba lei by xu hui xin !! i like ai qing yu wei the most...gei ni zhen ge shi jie the second and gu dan ba lei the last...but all very nice !!! maybe not every part of the song is describing my situation but mostly ba...

here are some meaningful lyrics frm :

1.ai qing yu wei
wo ai ni de xin , ni zhe me ren xin dou qiao sui
gei ni de an wei..nan dao zhi shi wo de yi chang wu hui
gao shu wo ba...wo wu suo wei
liu guo de lei...qing qing de yu wei
ni ai guo de xin , yao wo zen yang cai neng huan de hui
ai qing de yu wei...yuan lai zhi shi wo de yi chang wu hui
ni dou shou hui...wo wu suo wei
suo you de bei shang you wo lai mian dui

2.gei ni zheng ge shi jie
wo yao gei ni zhen ge shi jie
ai hu ni shi wo yi ei zi de shi ye
wo mei you mai yuan
gei ni yi gei cai se shi jie
mei yi tian wo men kuai le den xiang nian
mei you ju li mei you zhong dian

3.gu dan ba lei
wo bu hui man man man man wang ji yi duan ai qing
huang...huang huang zhang zhang gen zhe shi jie xuan zhuan
ma ma fan fan tian tian hu xi luan xiang
wo bu yao wang mang mang mang mang gu yi qi pian zi ji
pin..pin pin fan fan hu lue wo de meng xiang
gu gu dan dan ye ye kan zhe yue guang
ban bu dao wei le ai qing kong zhuan

all the phrase above is i listen den write out de..so if got any part wrong den correct me..thanks !

[ivechanged]
*qi qing hen wei xian,suo yi yao yong gan,shi jian hui bang wo de mang !!!

2004-08-21T14:02:00.000+08:00

back...!! so long nv blog le..busy la thats why !! i hate weekends lo...got nth to do at home except study den canot see her also !! kaoz..damn siian !! had mock exam today...took pictures using carlin and terence fone with my brothers...keith and john !! den also took with my member of parliament but one was absent today if not family photo liao !! the member of my parliament include terence chung hong abigail and geraldine !! for now..they are the ones who truly really noe me the best !! other than them...i guess no one else truly understand me le !! so happy that i got had them as a my frenz..last time wasnt really on good terms with them until this yr ba..and becoz we had something in common ba..FORUM...haha...so thats what brought the 5 of us together..!! whenever the 5 of us online...or smthings 3 or 4..we will definitely chat in grps and begin our hot topic !! haha...!! they are always there for me...even when im at the lowest point hor..they can make me laugh loh especially that chung hong !! haha...!! geraldine is a good pal whom i can easily and comfortably confide in..abigail is a fren who is willing to lend me a helping hand whenever im in trouble..terence is a gd bro that is there to pull me up when im down and chung hong is a joker who can make me laugh till cramp !! without anyone of them...the parliament would not be complete !!

yesterday had conference with them..everyone was present !! can also consider as one of the happiest chat i ever had ba..!! aiyah whenever got them sure happy de...!! they kept supporting me and told me everything will turn out fine..!! professor chung hong said something impressive...made me shock loh !! he said : a no frm a girl is never the end...it is the begining!! haha...makes sense ? meaningful ? definitely is !! dunno why like this phrase so much leh !! think of it..even if it does not makes sense but i still like it !! haha...!! plus...i realised one common phrase used..whether to console someone or to prove something..this phrase is commonly used ! they kept telling me..time will prove everything...well perhpahps not everything but most of it and the rest is up to my effort..!! will time really tell someone somthing somewhere someday ?!?

anyway...something quite sad happen today la..only some of my parliament noe loh !! hmm...got comment frm them la and hope it's true loh !! i will study de...!! dont worry !!

p.s will time really really prove my love for her ?!?!

[waiting]
`a no frm a girl is never the end..it is the beginning !!

2004-08-19T17:29:00.000+08:00

back frm oral !!! aarggghh...did badly for it !! dont wanna talk about it le...anyway...today is a very special day but was disappointing..!! showed her the since the day post...she read halfway den return le...and told me to concentrate on studies first..!! yes i will concentrate but i will not give up on u as well...!! also did something silly today...during hist lesson...took my pencil and write all my feelings and thoughts down on the foolscap paper !! it was my first experience but no bad la..make me felt a bit better...but not very much la !! spent the whole of hist lesson doing it...wrote alot of things...whatever comes to my mind i just jot it down...now i read le..think of it..haha !! found it very silly...laugh at myself !! found out i actually got so many question marks in my mind de !!! hahahahahahaha....silly me !!

[heartbroken]
*pls dont avoid me...

since the day...

2004-08-17T20:27:00.000+08:00

since the day u treat me as your fren...since the day our friendship got better...since the day we talked alot...since the day i walked to interchange with u...since the day u teased me...since the day u laugh at my jokes...since the day u replied my sms...since the day u accepted my cd...since the day u told me the cd was nice...since the day i went out with u on sunday...since the day i know u...since the day we watch movie together...since the day we talked on phone...since the day u asked me for opinion...since the day u ask me why didnt i perform on national day...since the day u smiled at me...since the day we start bickering with each other...since the day of secondary sch...since the day we be frenz...since the day u were concerned that i didht had my lunch...since the day i sat beside u...since the day u care for me...since the day u waited for bus with me...since the day we played basketball together...since the day i taught u basketball...since the day i made origami flower and heart for u...since the day we celebrated your bday...since the day u accepted my bday gift..since the day u accept the toro book i bought for u...since the day u told me the book was well kept...since the day we did charity work together...since the day u made my day...since the day we took photo together...since the day u were willing to listen to my mp3...since the day we went chinese garden together...since the day we played together...since the day u said your first hello me...since the day u said your first bye to me...since the day u taught me how to do maths...since the day u ask me how i think of u...since the day u told me about how u think of me...since the day u confided in me...since the day u were willing to let me help u with your problems...since the day u said thanks to me..since the day u remembered my bday...since the day u bought my gift for my bday...since the day u told me u were afraid i didnt like your present..since the day u told me i look nice in your pouch...since the day u told me u actually wanted to buy pink giodarno shirt for me...since the day u noe i like pink colour giodarno shirt...since the day we went tp together...since the day we met at pasir ris mrt to go orchard..since the day u took the initiative to talk to me...since the day u asked me to tag along with u...since the day u made me not felt left out...since the day u asked if i wanna eat ice-cream...since the day u told me to burn yida songs for u...since the day u told me not to rush to burn your cd...since the day u stepped into my life...since the day we became close frenz...since the day u conmplained to me about anything...since the day u allowed me to whisper near your face..since the day u allowed me to stand beside u when taking photo...since the day u allowed me to take your plastic bag for u...since the day u told me the question's answer...since the day we did group work together...since the day u wish me gd luck for my exam...since the day u gave me tissue without me asking...since the day i look at u...since the day i dreamt of u...since the day u were willing to share with me half the vcd..since the day u stand next to me..since the day u called out my name...since the day u talked about me among your frenz...since the day u laugh at my silliness for washing contact lense with detergent...since the day u forgive me...since the day u praise me...since the day i called u hamasaki...since the day we had at orchard...since the day we talked alot in the mrt...since the day i waited for u...since the day u didnt mind me waiting for u..since the day u was not angry with me for insisting to wait for u...since the day we stood beside each other at the escalator...since the day showed me a smiley face when u replied my sms..since the day u ask if i really wanted u to buy toast for me...since the day u were not angry with me for disturbing your slp and teach me maths instead...since the day u looked at me..since the day u shared your point of view with me..since the day u said that tkd was playing cheat...since the day u talked to me when i was being left out...since the day that many more things have happened...i always believe that we have a chance of being together !!! i always do...

[sincetheday]
*will we still sit next to each other very geo lesson !?!?

2004-08-17T20:14:00.000+08:00

im back !! wonder why im back...so fast ?!?! haiiz..missed my blog !! anyway..cried in class today...most throw face thing is hor i cry beside her leh !! so shameful !! i wanted to talk to her but just couldnt stop myself frm crying...haiiz !! but i felt much better after crying out rather than keeping it in my heart..well..think i scare most of my frenz..coz they was like...huh jesper cry ?!?! what the hell happen sia ?!! haha...for frenz who were concerned..sorry about that and i really appreciate that u all were there for me...thanks !!

[sobsob]
*when wil u ever hear the cries of fmy heart...

2004-08-16T19:37:00.000+08:00

im going to stop blogging for a few days !! im very depressed over something...so sorry i couldnt have it with those who are concern about me...i really cant say it out..dont ask me abt it also !! just now im really very sad...

for those who are consistent reader of my blog..im sorry that i have to stop blogging..!! i hope i will be back to blog also...but have to wait till i picked up my mood again...haiiz !!

[terriblyupset]
*this is a very risky investment...

2004-08-15T14:17:00.000+08:00

yea...wake up liao !! haha...finally..!! so tired sia ! early in the morning hor i stomachache liao went toilet but no shiit !! stupiid wan loh !! hmm...feel like sms-ing her but dont know say what topic !!! haiiz..what is happening ?!? is it a gd sign or bad ?!? although can see her from mon to sat but this weekend it feels like...months nv see her liao !! wa lao...siian leh !! i want to see her !!! erm...the idea of asking her out to study together hor is still stirring in my head leh...dunno shld ask her out to study not..dunno she want not !! if she want..most prob will study geo or maths..haiiz !! tell u hor..even if she go her hse downstair the minimart buy thing ask me go i also go wan !! crazy hor...aarrgghhh !!! mad liao la...

[heartaches]
*nv felt so hurt in my life...

2004-08-15T02:21:00.000+08:00

hmm...last time i have a dream which is to play for a basketball club !! but find very long also dont have so gave up hope...den play bball aimlessly !! BUT now...everything is going to be different !! ive got an aim..a target...which is HOME UNITED !! weiiz...dont wu hui..not soccer de but basketball de !! it's a very well organised team lo...heard not quite easy to get in den training also very tough...but GOOD...i like !! the more tough the more i like...!! haha...!! alot people say canot tahan wan...i dont believe...i what nv tahan before...sure can de !! have faith !! i actually wanna go trial now...but got o level !! shiit wan lo !! must wait till o finish den can go...but also bo bao i will get in la...but they say is unlimited tries de !! if fail hor..i go personal training den go back again...try until i can enter the team !! it's my dream loh !! i finally can fulfil my dream le !! i really want to play for the club....arrgghh....cant wait to go see the training and see how gd those players are !! heard the training ground at toa payoh...nvm...far is not a prb !! as long as got the PASSION can le...haha !! love the GAME !! ill work hard for it...frm now on..i will play serious in every game and try to improve myself !!! for my dream...im willing to sacriface anything except HER la..haha !! im willing to sacriface my youth...time...and...erm...dunno la !! all i noe is this is what i play bball for...this is what i always wanted...this is what iver always been waiting for..this is my dream..my wish..my hope...my desire...my world...my life !!! HOME UNITED GOGOGO !!
pls remember to leave a vacancy for me...ill be there right after o levels....wahahahahaha

[waitforme]
*but still...SHE is still as imp to me...i miss u...

2004-08-15T02:13:00.000+08:00

yea...today went west plaza to play bball again !! very little people only leh...ray nv come down !! heard he went east coast to work...how can ?!?! i once a week come down leh...nv give me face !! haha jk laz..!! starting very siian leh...got this guy name A...he hor play until very fucked up..!! everybody play until so serious hor..he joke here joke there..den he very lousy wan lo but like to say other people here and there !! i hate playing with these kind of people leh...know how to tok only but dunno how to play !! play with philippine he also not serious...actually tot of asking jac to sub him but i dunno how to kai kou so in the end also didnt !! den we won phillipine hor..he nv contribute anything also den laugh at others..yaya papaya !! sai wan loh !! den got one match steven nv play den he slack like hell...make us lose loh !! only noe how to shoot and miss but nv gets rebound !!! lose liao say steven too good dont have him will die..cock wan loh !! is he lousy he sabo us lose de !! he stay there he anyhow play his problem la..but i stay tam..come down every once a week...expect to play so challenging and serious game !! but he spoil everything !! haiiz...today is a wasted trip !! all thanks to him...

[zhokdulan]
*all i wanted was to be the one u choose to carry on your life with...

2004-08-15T02:03:00.000+08:00

today whole day nv talk to her leh...nv even sms her !!! feels so terrible..!! morning go sch for mock exam..finish le also nv say bye to her..actually can walk with her de..but hor i thinking od the maths question so i wasted a chance to walk with her or maybe even send her home !! damn it !! but in the end went to watch twins effect2 with john edwina and sabrina !! nice la...!! nv sms her leh..dunno why...sort of control myself frm sms-ing her !! dunno why also...thinking whether what her fren say is true not..? that she dont like people to keep sms-ing her ? BUT winna got a point also..handphone dont sms and call...den for what ?!!? haha !! hmm...die la...shldnt have controlled myself coz now hor canot stop liao !! miss like crazy...aarrgghh !!! feel like asking her out to study tml...but dunno she want not ?!!? even if she want..also dunno study what !! haha...funny hor !! anyway i dont think she dare go out with me to study de la...i mean just me and her la...she sure dont dare de !! confirm chop chop...haha !!

[waiting]
*the song by the name ai ying yu wei is nice !! suits me alot...

2004-08-14T14:13:00.000+08:00

wa lao...very shiit wan leh !! i type very long liao hor den i publish post my com say page canot be displayed !! what the fish !! haiyo..lazy to retype liao la !! haha...stupiid idiot !! today nv tok to her..not even hello and bye..wasted like hell !! gonna miss her like crazy..going asylum later..coz sure go crazy de !! haha blez !! at nite going to play bball le...yyiiipppee !! go study le...

[seriouslovesick]
*have u ever miss me...even for a sec ?!?!

2004-08-13T21:29:00.000+08:00

hey im back !! wonder why i always post msg here ? coz hor there is no one there for me to tok to about HER..those that can talk to me hor..either got stead la..or want to study den no time for me !! i dunno who to find also...so hor..blog is the best !! write in blog hor...can make me feel better...at least there is someplace to confide in..den hor always no reply de..so i can say anyting i want !! haha !! hmm...anyway u noe hor..the only time i can stop thinking about HER is when i play basketball...but not with those lousy wan laz..haha..must with my 760 frenz !! play with them hor...can make me temporary stop missing her..but when i take a break..ill start missing her again..so in order to stop missing her i must keep engaging in game but den also not possible wan ma..unless i keep winning la..!! now i think the best confider is my blogspot liao !! haha...siian wan leh..want to find someone to talk actually is very easy wan but find someone who can talk to me about HER..hmm...difficult liao...all those that can hor...always no time for me...hmmppf !!! who can i find ne ?!?! i want to find HER to talk...but dont disturb her la..let her study !! canot always call her also...later she got irritated den i DIE !! can only mo mo den pray for her...hope she do well for chinese and get a2 !! who is free ?!?! lalalalala...im bored !!!!

[feelingsobored]
*miss u like crazy especially during weekends...

2004-08-13T20:53:00.000+08:00

hmm...dunno why hor..the more i think of it the more i want to talk to her and clear my name !! haiiz !! anyway...frm what i heard frm hohoho...erm...felt much better la...coz she an wei me loh !! haha...so gd !! she talked to me very long leh..coz i dunno who to find le..stead de pei stead...want to study de study...tuition de tuition...want to slp de slp...but lucky still got hohoho to talk to me...haha !! well...starting to think about it..does she really consider me as her close frenz so she treat me like this ? does she consider me as someone closer to her so she treated me like this ? why am i treated differently ? i want to know why !!! does it show that im consider as a better fren den the others ? or does it show that she dont like me and wanted to get rid of me ? does it show that she noe i die die also wun du lan her so she is out to shoot me ? why does she trea me hu leng hu re ( sometimes cold sometimes 'hot' ) ? is something or SOMEONE affecting her ? does it show someone is out to destroy our friendship ? does it mean that she is feeling pressurised by someone ? is someone pressuring her not to befren with me ? is she giving up our frenship coz of her fren ? i got so many qns to ask loh..but i cant think of it..coz too many le..anyway also have to go buy dinner le..gtg..take care folks..ill continue if i have time later !!

[question-aire]
*when can we clear doubts we have for each other ?

2004-08-13T20:46:00.000+08:00

for the one i hated the most :

hmm...got to know that u have been staring at her when she walked pass u...i dont find it surprising coz i noe u have a habit of staring at people !! and also..u like to hide at one corner and look at her..!! can u pls stop all these...?!!? stare at her for what ?!!? she feel very irritated u noe..its like...very weird loh..why u walk pass her must stare at her..kaoz !! dont deny...u have the HABIT of staring at others...u told me before u had this habit..so better dont deny..!! i just hope that..u would not stare at her when she walk pass u...whats the point ?!?! people walk pass u stare at u u happy not..u feel easy not ? think la !! pls put a stop to this..it's very childish...!! dont STARE at her anymore...please STOP !!

[puzzled]
*i dont get it..what are your intentions ?!?!

2004-08-13T20:13:00.000+08:00

hmm...think ive cleared quite a number of misunderstandings with her le but still got one thing haven clear my name only !! haiiz...got to know alot alot of things today !! i got to know that she doesnt blame me totally for the incident but she still sort of angry with me coz she said thay if i noe this wud happen i shldnt have stick to her when lalala...haha...dunno can say out not...!! actualy i dunno if can say out not leh...but i feel like sharing out coz i feel so uneasy keeping it in my heart !! hmm...no matter what hor..my frenz have been telling me..aiyah can de la got chance de la..can de can de..have confidence !! BUT hor...i dont know leh..if really can den is the best la BUT those can also be just some excuse to make me happy for the moment..some excuse to make me run away frm facing the problem !! den hor..she talk to me hor..very diff frm other boy..and now den i realised it's ONLY me...she tok to other people so wen rou de..but to me she so straightforward..hmm...if look at diff point of view..actually got bad and good point la...i hope it is the good one...!! i really wish to clear my name..i dont wan her to hate me or get angry with me lo !! actually she treat me very well de but just dont know why...sometimes...it's just so different..!! i dunno how to tell u all also...but its likeshe is the middle girl ba..den pressure frm studies and frenz...maybe she feeling very xin ku ma..hmm who knows ?!?! whenever her fren is ard me..she will be cold towards me but whenever she isnt..she will be nice...hmm...got alot of thing very mystery la..find mystery case...alot of thing hor very suspicious..hmm...tried my best not to think about it..well..i hope this weekend will be a gd break for me to ponder over it...hope something gd will happen...

[findthingsweird]
*if u ever met with any problem..u can always approach me !!

2004-08-13T19:53:00.000+08:00

yawn...!! just wake up only...so tired today !! hmm..today hor purposely go sch late leh..6.30 liao hor my mother asked if i need to go sch den i told her need la but first 3 period also nv study..let me slp longer la...6.50 den wake up..haha !! took own sweet time to bath and make my hair..7+ den left home...dilly dally..haha !! outside sch hor..i saw sundrum still there..what the hell man...i purposely come late is to avoid him..den dunno why today after everyone go back class le he still there..so i decided to go minimart and buy curry puff..slowly enjoy my breakfast !! finish liao den slowly walked in..tot nothing would happen until mr quek call me..wa lao...suay leh !! he told me went office to get the late form..went in..stood around and acted blur..sundrum asked me was i late ? immediately i said NO la...haha !! den walk out of office liao...scott free !! wahahaha !!! went to 4n class den hor saw sam inside i nv go in..i go another round den go back my class sit for a while..bi bi feng tou..haha !! went down half an hr later..told the teacher i had stomacache..haha stupiid sia..like that also believe me..blez !! next..we had fun in our SNGAPORE IDOL'S lesson...haha...she went in only we tease her liao..bet she regret taking part in sg idol..haha !! she told us her experience that day...seems interesting..haha !! den hor..before she left..she sang what she performed that day loh..wa..listen liao hor...i wanna noe the judges address liao..go burn their house !!!! why nv choose tracy ?!!? SHE SING GOOD LOH !!! stupiid wan leh...tracy sing really very nice...just dunno what the stupiid judges are thinking...haha !! go burn their hse la..!! den last of all...mt..si bei siian !! i dont understand why leh..a2 also wanna retake..hmm..make the class atmosphere so tense..just siian !! for afternoon lesson hor...so fun leh..we were late loh..purposely de !! we went central to see doctor with my frenz..reach central at 1pm..den slowly walk here and there..den take our own sweet time...after seeing doctor..we took out bloody own sweet time again to have lunch..den tok cock..shake leg !! haha..den still go buy bubble tea and drink..dilli derlli..so song !! walked to sch that time..we hide under banner den keep calling out 'HO !! HO !! HO !!' haha...too bad she nv hear...!! stroll to canteen den walk slowly to lab..was outside for quite sometime before we knocked on the door..haha !! damn funny !! sch quite fun la...but nv really tok to her..haiiz..waste another day...

[hateweekends]
*one day i hope u will miss me the way im missing u now

2004-08-12T23:22:00.000+08:00

ok this post hor is my people who tag at my board...

hmm...recently alot of things happen la..alot people tag at my blog..concerning jean's fren de matter..true im really angry at her..but ive stop calling her names le..!! so i beg..frenz of mine..u all also stop le k..i mean..we scold them...they scold us..den when is this thing going to end ? en en yuan yuan he shi liao ?!?! so why not everyone just stop scolding each other..and let this thing come to an end..? i know i kept calling her names in the past..but that was the past...now as long as she dont interfere in my life i wont interefer in hers..as long as she dont interfere in my frenz life..i wont interfere in hers !!

for jean's fren : last time i scold u or what...hurt u or what..ok i say sorry here but this sorry doesnt mean anything..it just an apologies for calling u names but dont misunderstood..i still cant forgive u..the reason why im willing to put a stop to everything is becoz of ur fren..jean...i think u shld really thank her..she has been coming her consistently and making peace..helping u solve things with me..u shld be lucky that u have a fren like her..!! u want to zhu fu me and her..fine..thanks !! but i really hope u noe where u were wrong in the past and make sure u dont repeat it again becoz now she is irritated with me as she tot that it was me who got her involved in our matter...u dont have to do anything to help me out..just leave me alone and i will try to solve thes thing myself...i will be greatly appreciative if u just stop sms-ing me...thanks !!

to jean : thanks for being the peace maker..tot u didnt want to say out ur name...why in the end still say ?!! haha..felt like being frenz with u..if dont wan nvm la..!! maybe we 2 not fated to be frenz la..haha !! but if u are willing den u add me in msn loh...my email add is at the side..!! by the way..i dont know who the new anonymous is..i dunno how to stop..i really dont...can swear loh..if not i wont be accepted by my dream girl..serious enuff ?!!? haha...anyway really have to thank u...

back to everybody : i really hope i have made myself clear..previously got one anonymous already stopped le..now i dont wan another anonymous to come and make things bad for everyone..u all can feel free to tag your feelings about my post..give feedbacks on my blog..but pls dont make it a place for verbal war...it does not benefit anyone here..thank you very much !!

[troubledboy]
*hope this thing will be put to a stop

2004-08-12T23:05:00.000+08:00

haiiz..sch today...siian again !! bad mood early in the morning..gave a 'everyone offended me' face !! but luckily chung hong terence and geri cheered me up in hall when we were waiting for our chinese o level results !! well..not bad la..got a2 !! dont plan to retake..haha !! today hor..never really talk to her leh..got this feeling she angry with me..but dont know over what only !! i only managed to talk to her after sch while we were having out mock exam in class..just asked if she could lend me her staple only...den while waiting for xw...asked if she wanna listen to the eng disc i burn for geri..best want ok !!! very very nice hor !! walked to white sand in quite a big grp..played soccer half way...and was talking about eugene being a CAMPER when he play cs..haha !! damn fed up leh tok to him...my blood can boil sia !! so i told him to talk to my hand coz the face wun listen !! haha...copy my fren phrase de !! blez !!

anyway my thoughts were proved to be wrong..called her to ask if she was going to retake her chinese..advice her not to retake coz it's like..waste of time ma..why not spent in on other subjects and score better..but she still wanna retake..so i can ony wish the best for her !! hope she will approach me if she got any prbs..im be more den willing to help her out !! i even found out actually she not angry with me...phew !! told to to take gd care of herself..but she was like gone silent...why ?!?! normal ma...frenz concern for each other normal ma..dunno why she went silent..haha !! i got to know something leh..frm so many conversation i had with her..i think i can deduct something..but not very sure !! den hor..got one thing very funny..before she got to the fone..someone said something...haha..how i wish it was true !! wanna noe ?!!? NO WAY !! haha..secret !! finally i managed to get my mood back for studies...!!

i really hope that im thinking too much and was being over-sensitive and everything that i tot of was wrong !! very wrong !! anyway..alot of people say they were touched by my 'since the day' post..blez !! weiiz..i spent one hr on it leh !! dont pray pray hor..haha !!

just for YOU : i cant stop u frm retaking chinese la..coz afterall it's your decision ma..also your parents decision but all i can do now is to support u loh..if u ever need any help or u encounter any problem...feel free to look for me la...i go up mountain go down sea sure help u de !! and hor..sick must see doctor..dont ying lai..kei da ke xiao leh..dont play play hor..!! pls take very good care of yourself..drink more water and sleep early..dont create so much stress for yourself !! just remember..im always there for you !! gambatte...

[relieved]
*disappointed that i didnt get to sit with u today during GEO...

2004-08-11T20:58:00.000+08:00

2004-08-11T18:36:00.000+08:00

u are a very nice and pleasant girl !! ure sweet and caring...!! u pretty and clever !! ure da girl of my dream !! ure everything to me !! ure my life !! if one day u wud come and ask me which is more important ? u or my life ?!?! i wud tell u it's my life..becoz your are my life !! u are what i look forward in going sch for...u are what i cary on bringing smile to others for...u are what i need to carry on being happy...without u in my life...i really dunno what to do !!!

just finish showering...had this qn stirring in my mind..i really wish to know the answer...im wondering the way u treat me on sunday...with real care and patience..does it come frm the bottom of your heart or is it becoz u pity me that i was the only boy there ?!?! if u pity me coz im the only boy there..well...nth to say but if it comes frm the bottom of your heart..it shows that im not just an ordinary fren to u ba..coz u really did care and concern alot for me that day...!! i really wish to know the answer...but guess im dreamng again coz ull nv come to my blog..haiiz !! but i hope...the answer is...u treat me nice frm the bottom of your heart...

[upset.like.never.brefore]
*my love for u is not as simple as u think...

2004-08-11T18:26:00.000+08:00

i always wanted to find someone to talk to but who is there ?!? wanted to find my 760 frenz but they dunno anything abt what's happening in sch..tell them also no use although i noe they will be most willing to help !! wanted to tell my sch brothers..also no use !! telling xw is the same as talking to the wall..created alot of trouble for winna and keith about that bitc* incident le..dont wan mafan him again...john busy pei-ing his stead..always no time..he cant help much also...!! spent most of his time with his precious daughters and stead...!! there is one for me...but she is...how to say...hard to contact...she seldom come nline also..den she very busy !! dont want to disturb her !! who else ?!!? my family ?!?! nah !! no thanks !! they wont understand...they nv will...all they do is listen and nod their heads..no comment at all..so whats the point telling them ?!!? wanted to confide in HER but...she always not free also..scared she find me irritating or what...scared this and that...although i really really wanna confide in her...but does she wan to be my listener ?!?!

[nvendingfeeling]
*will u give me and urself a chance ?

2004-08-11T17:40:00.000+08:00

are her words reliable !? can she be trusted ?!! is she up to no good ?!?! haiiz..!! found out alot of things today...!! if YOU ( her fren ) ever come across my blog again and read the post i wrote for u...u will realise how much i gave in to u !! how much i have been forgiving and forget !! how much i wanted to be a fren ?!! maybe we are just not fated to be frenz la..but dont be frenz is one thing..why cant u just leave me alone..and let me pursue my own dreams instead of trying to stop me !!! i dont get u loh !!! where have i offended u ?!! everytime i get angry with u..i will tel myself u are her fren..canot angry canot angry...so difficult u noe !!! u ask my frenz la...haven i give in enuff ?!?! those words that u said..made me half believe...but i wont give up until the day i heard those things frm her..out frm her mouth..even if she does..i might not be giving up !! why ?!?! im just followong where my heart wants me to go...might sound stubborn but thats me !!!

k now abt the jasmine thingy..guess i have to make it clear !! it's NOT me who get her involved de loh !! it's HER !!! NOT ME !! the moment i know SHE got her involve..the first thing i did was to get her out of the matter !! dont believe u can ask around !! i really did loh !! i noe me and HER thing does not concern lm BUT get it clear k...it's NOT ME WHO GET HER INVOLVED !! IT'S NOT ME WHO PULL HER DOWN THE WATER !! IT'S HER !!! NOT ME !!

to the one that misuderstood : i really hope u are not angry with me !! u got to believe me ! it's not me !! it's her...u can ask around if u dont believe me...ask those cg people...can ask carlin also !!! i nv wanted u to get involved in my matter with my x. stead but i really hope u can understand...i noe u are irritated coz u tot i was the one who got u involved but i say again...it's really not me !!! dunno where u got the info frm..but all i can say is...it's really not me !! hope u will believe me..the only proof is u goard asking..especially cg people...they will noe !!! haiiz why am i repeating all these and emphasising that im not the one..whats the point ? u nv get to see this also...haiiz !! but i really want u to noe it's not me !! i wanted to explain to u but how ? will u give me time to explain ? i want to explain but SHE is always there ...dont even get the chance to explain anything to u !! why am i so concerned over this issue...?? becoz what u think is very imp to me !! any other person's comment is nth to me...but yours..im really concern on how u think of me !!

for the one who created all these trouble : u happy now ?!?! now that the thing has spread to her..she angry with me..im sad..im down..u happy !! bet u are !!! bitc* !!! i hate u !!!! now that she is angry with me...u accomplish ur mission le la !! god damn it...hope u get run over by a car !! u son of a gun !! dont ever let me see u ...u bloody stinky old hag !! iver expected this day to come...just didnt expect it would be so fast...u noe what..i feel like smacking the hell out of u !! lucky u not boy...if not ling bei make sure u go hosp. !! i regret knowing u !!! worst x i ever have...how i wish i could go burn ur damn bloody hse right now !!

back to the crowd : i really am at loss now !! i just shouted at my bro who was concern abt me...really sorry !! i just got no mood for anything else now...just feel like gazing into the space and do nothing or the best is slp forever !! i feel that what she said might be part of her plan that try to stop us frm being together..but lets take it that it's the truth...i dont think i can take it loh !!! now we are progressing...i guess...yet u come and spoil everything and put me back to square one !!! i had abit achievement only...den u come make things worst !! do u enjoy doing all these ?!! if u are u must be sick !!! everyone has got one chance and all im asking is just one chance yet u dont even want to let me have this chance...!! sometimes i really hope u nv even exist..!! u said u dont like me as day passes..den still tok to me for what !! i susally will feel better after blogging but today the more i blog the more terible i feel !!! i got so many things to say but i just cant let it out...just now when walking to white sand..was keeping a dist frm her coz i tot she might me angry with me for shouting at her fren...wanted to pei her walk to interchance knowing she is alone but didnt coz i couldnt bring myself to do so !! something just stopped me !! i really hope one day in ur dreams...my blog appear and u got to see whatever i wrote and let u understand how the hell i felt and all the foolish things that i ever done for u just to see u smile...just a smile !! if u dont like people to sms u...fine...i wun !! but will u remember me ? will our frenship be pull apart ? i dont wan all these to happen...i nv felt like this before !! tml will be getting back o level resutl..was quite excited about it..but now..dont even wanna bother abt it...pass fail heckcare la...the most imp is whether u will forgive me not and whether u noe that it's really not me who got u involved !! i once told u our frenship means alot to me..i remember i did and it's really true and i can swear...if i ever lie that i dont reasure our frenship will be strike by lightning and run over by car !!! i really cherish and treasure our frenship...!! do u ?!!? im also facing competition frm other boys which made me more woried in losing the chance of being together with u !! if one day someone is to tell u all that ive done for u i dont think it can be finished in one day...u might not be touched by what i do for u..but at least...thats the most foolish and silly thig i ever done for a girl just to make the girl smile !! i dont know my way of approach is correct or wrong but all i noe i is i really love u !! love can be nurtured...why cant u give me and yourself a chance to let this frenship sparkle off to become a love relationshiip ?!?! why cant u give me and yourself a chance to try out this 'everybody say impossible' relationship ?!?! why cant u give me and yourself a chance to make each other life's more meaningful ?!!? somehow i got this feeling that w have the chance but sometimes the way u are treating me is like...u dont wan to noe me as a fren like that ...maybe im over sensitive la..but...haiiz !!! feeling very depressed now lohz...!! im glad u like the same foto as me...but whats the point ?!?! i always tot we had something in common..but now..come to think of it...do we ?!?! i noe u like art and i suck at those...but diff liking people can also get together de ma...why wun u just let this love be nurtured ?!!? i believe if u are willing to do..it definitely will turn out well..yes im sure it will !! i give u my word !!! we were still having great time on sunday while shopping with the japs...remembered u know i was the only boy..u talked to me..asked me along whenever u go and stuff !! everything was great but now...what happen ?!!? just becoz of some rumours u heard or some incomplete storys...u angry with me ? i dont blame u la..but like what i say...other people misunderstand me nvm..but not u !!! u can ask my frenz how crazy i am over u...i really am !! although some of my frenz said u were just ordianry..but no !! i find that u are very special...i dunno wad really attracted me but all i noe is im attracted to u !! if i really dont have the chance...can u pls let me noe ?!?! dont keep me in the dark and let me pin hopes on us getting together...the longer u delay the deeper i will be hurt unless u are wiiling to accept me la...well maybe when penguins can fly ?!?! haiiz...!!!

[moody]
*pls forgive me !! it's really not me !!

2004-08-11T17:12:00.000+08:00

IM SAD !!! sch sucks today !! it suck !! it really do !! went sch only hair kena caught liao but this one small case la..i wont cut de !! didnt got much chanc to talk to her leh..last 2 period social studies while waiting for sim to ocme i took the chance to talk to he rbut she seem to be cold towards me !! she seem to be angry at something..she seem to be avoiding me !! WHY ?!?! she must have know something !! well..got to noe that she was having headache..went to concern she also ignore me !! haiiz...!! after maths hor..tolong paul lee to tong bang us to white sand an was scolded by someone that i was creating noise pollution...didnt noe what got onto me but i shouted back...i dunno why i canot tahan her today..other days i can...i always am..always giving in to her but today i just dunno why i cant !! met jerry at 21 bus stop...well...got to know smthing...made me ponder over it until i miss my stop. !! i forgot to alight loh..!! it's like...huh ??!!? reach my bust stop le ar ?!?!? just couldnt control my tears frm flowing down..haiiz..useless me !!

[crybaby]
*why why why ?!?! why must u go against me ?!?!

2004-08-10T23:41:00.000+08:00

aaarrgghhh...looking at the photos we took together agin...smile on my face automaitcally will come out de..but it also make me miss her more !!! hmm...come to think of it..actually hor..abit regret leh..coz hor..nv seize my chance..only got one photo me and her very close only...the rest was like..there is a gap between us..made myself feel so extra..!! talking abt extra i wonder if i really am extra in the pic ?!?! haiiz..to any others..i dont mind but a slong as she dont fine me extra.i dont give a damn about what other thinks !! hope she doesnt !! i want to take photo with her again !!! wonder when will it be our next photo taking seesion...wonder when will it be just u and me standing in front of the machine and taking photo with no one else but us !! guess there is still a long way to go...haiiz !!

[wastedleh]
*when can i step into pretty in tokyo with u alone..just the two of us..when ??

2004-08-10T21:47:00.000+08:00

im bored !! doing physics now..realised only got 9 qns..haha !! now stop at 6..time to take a break !! blez !! lazy leh me..haha !! although tml can see her le..but im still wondering what she is doing now ? is she fine ? is she studying ? is she stress ? does she need help ? im willing to help if i can..!! does she need someone there to remind her to take care of herself ? if she ever need one..im willing to do so without any complaints !! hmm...just sms-ed her...dont think she will reply la..most probably still doing work..well..hope im not disturbing her...!!

[alwayslovesick]
*im willing to do anything...just for you !!!

2004-08-10T18:07:00.000+08:00

hohoho !! finally back le..so tired !! went town to play counter strike..play like shiit..but still not bad la..haha !! went to play pool after that..play like shiit also...last min den got back my form...but have to go liao..coz scared later not enuff to pay !! budget !!! haha...!! went back after that..xinwei and keegan they all wanna act cute..walked diff way to mrt frm us...den in the end we board the train le..reach kallang le den they call us and told us they were waiting for us in town..haha !! serve them right...who ask them so childish...walk together dont wan..walk seperately..haha !! so tiring..!! eyes look at com so long very pain...must take a rest liao !! anyway im missing her so much..whenever i die hor..in counter strike la..will start to miss her..den type some confidential msg...haha...only john know..!! after cs...wanted to sms her..ask wad she doing..but she confirm wont reply de..coz for the past few days she keep going out ma..den these few days sure chiong homework de..just wanted to know how is she doing...flipped my fone..type the msg i wanna send her...but never send...haiiz..dunnno why also..maybe dont wanna disturb her study ba...or maybe i noe she wun reply so i dont wan to sms so i wont be sad when she dont reply..maybe maybe maybe !!! for now i can only maybe...dont know what she thinking also..!! well manage to inform her tml social studies is open book..she replied quite slow..so i guess she studying ba..hope she is doing fine !! hope she dont stres herself out too much !! last of all...gd luck to all those who took o level chinese coz tml will be the release of the results..dont cry k !! haha..all the best..!!

just for YOU : if u ever need a shoulder to cry on..someone to talk to if u are not satisfied with your results..dont forget that i will always be there for you..my door for you is 24 hrs..free of charge !! if u ever need anything...even if it is venting out your anger..im always available !! do remember..im always there and i always will...all the best !! i believe u will achieve wonderful grades..have some faith and confidence !! gambatte...!!

[sotired]
*my door for u is always open...

2004-08-09T21:49:00.000+08:00

i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her i miss her

[madboy]
*do i ever stand a chance ?

2004-08-09T21:24:00.000+08:00

this msg is for her fren :

im not sure whether u will still come my blog la..last time got one period we quite close that time..u always got come de !! but now i dunno..anyway if u ever come across my blog..hope u read this k..no offence de !!

hmm...i dunno how to start also..well..if i got where say wrong hor..dont be offended k coz im just telling u how i feel loh !! really no offence de !! hope u understand..!! erm..got this feeling u dont like seeing me and her being close..everytime when im near her..u will sort of like not happy about it..and always thinking ways to let me not see her...always helping her or asking her to avoid me..dunno la..not very sure also..used to ask u for help...now i never le..coz i want to depend on myself !! i noe she dont like people talking abt me in front of her..i noe i noe..so i told myself..i cant depend on others i need to depend on myself..girl is i like de not my frenz so if i want her to accept me i need to depend on myself and not help of my frenz !! sometimes we might have little misunderstandings..but i have never hold grudges against u..even if i have i one two day will forget le !! i have always treated u well with the bottom of my heart but sometimes u like..sort of being abit sarcastic..abit la..sometimes hor we are just concern about u...we really are but u seem to think that we like to criticise u !! we dont..!! we are sincere in helping u..sometimes i talk mabe nv go thru my brain la..but i mean no harm..i have no intention !! sometiems u talk also made me fed up with u..but in the end..i still bu zhi bu jue forgive u !! i dont know why also..just feel like it !! i really appreciate u help me in the past..and im sorry if i caused u and her frenship to have any problems..with my greatest apology..i say sorry to u !! now i want to depend on myself...u dont have to help le..all u have to do..as part of being my fren..u shld support me..not physically but moraly..u dont have to do anything to help me get closer to her..i just hope u can give me ur support and blessing...all i want frm a fren like u..is to support me and not pull me down further...!!let me give u a example what im trying to say here !! e.g...im already alone in this deep hole..now..im seeking help frm her to help pull me up..but instead of helping her to pull me up..u are pulling her away frm me..leaving me in this hole alone !! u get it ma ?!? here im not trying to say u are the dunno what in my tooth..im not trying to say u keep sabo-ing me but sometimes that u do...maybe u dont realise la..really hai dao wo loh !! maybe u dont know la..but it really do !! i dont blame u also...coz u dunno what is happening here ma !! dont misunderstood leh..i noe u very understanding de..noe what im trying to say here..i noe u are her fren..i noe u are protecting her..i noe u want her to find someone good..someone worth she being with..i might bot be that perfect but why cant u give me a chance to prove to u that i can take gd care of ur fren too ?!? i noe u meant well...i noe u dont wan her to get cheated..but to u am i someone who will do that to her ?!!? i noe u are doing your part as a fren..but give me some freedom to show her my love can ?!?! i really really love her..i nv love someone as much before..!! pls grant me this chance...

i noe maybe all this decision might not be yours..it might be hers..if it really is..den im sorry again...but this is just how i feel...hope u will noe lohz...i dont like keeping it inside my heart coz i will feel uneasy !! if it really is her decision..haiiz..i dunno do what le !! im sure there is some secret between you two ba...although very curious to noe..but...if not fang bian..if she dont wan me to noe..nvm lohz..i will respect her decision !! whatever it is..i hope you will be reading this and i hope u understand what im trying to say to u..u can come and find me and talk to me personally about this issue i dont mind...i hope u get the msg..and not the wrong person..well...dont worry...it definitely will be a confidential conversation !! hope u understand..take care !!

2004-08-09T21:02:00.000+08:00

aarrgghh...im bored !! sort of hate holiday now..especially when we still have to prepare for the upcoming big examination..!! holiday hor..canot get to see my frenz..canot get to see her...den want to go out..also canot coz need to study..no money also !! si bei siian leh..den hor..sometimes i feel abit left out by frenz also..coz they have stead to pei..they will nv be lonely..not like me..steadless but waiting la...haha..not say lonely la..but..how to say...it's like they got someone there for them permanetly loh..i dont have..siian !! waiting for her...!! they bored hor..just have picked up their fone..sms their stead..their stead die die also will sms with them...or maybe call their stead go out la...all these...me hor..frenz keep entertaining to stead..den dont wan me liao...heheee !! weiiz...ho pang yao..hinting u all liao leh...blez !! nvm la...i tahan...i ren...very soon...i will be *ahem de...i hope so...haha !! anyway hor..if im given a choice..i would prefer living in dreams leh...coz hor in dreams..there is only me and her..just the two of us...holding hands..smiling at each other...and living happily ever after !! so sweet loh !! haha..but only in dreams only la...!! canot think so much...later hor...kena reject will fall deeper...true right ? haha..sometimes hor...i think alot de leh..some small thing hor..i can think until very far..highly over-sensitive wan...haha !! very funny de..sometimes i tell my fren these and that...den they will say...nth what...u think too much le la..haha !! den i think...hmm...ya...make sense..haha !! alot of people have been asking me to jia you..telling me sure can de...must have confidence...thanks you very much..but hor now the thing is not i dont wan to jia you not i dont have confidence...but i think i roughly noe where i stand in her heart ba !! to me..it's always better to think on the negative side..den hor if the result come out is positive..den sure happy liao siao de ma...rather den being too confident..den result come out negative...wa..jump off building arh ?!!? haha...not my style...!! think i mad liao...u noe hor..i keep looking at the photo we took together leh..will not get sick and tired looking at it...find it so sweet..haha !! i mean everybody la...not only her...everybody looks so sweet in the photo...ESPECIALLY her...haha !!! i even manage to send the pic into my fone..although quite blur la..but still very nice !!! now nv loook at photo liao...keep looking at my fone..blez !!

[seriouslovesick]
*missing you like never before...

2004-08-09T19:13:00.000+08:00

bla bla bla...bark bark bark...my fren told me someone wrote abt me in some dirty old blog..my fren told me abt the details..well...all i can say is....erm...what can i say ?!!? haha...bla bla bla...bark bark bark...true frenz here true frenz there...not ur frenz here not ur frenz there...wadever shiit...so what i call u names ? not happy ar ? too bad lo...dont act forgiving la...wish me here wish me there...il just take that a dog is barking...say want forget this and that...sai !! hypocrite ?!?! well...who knows if u are ?!? only u yourself know...u deny deny deny we all also lan lan...bark bark bark...bla bla bla...oh mine..why am i getting so angry...waste of time...waste of youth...glad me got smthing to look forward...what risk here risk there...mai act pro la...piece of shiit..anyway who the hell bother if u tag not...even if u tag we also dunno...who knows...u might be the anonymous..!! shld go scold my fren liao..why tell me all these stupid shiit..make me frown more..more wrinkles...siian..must go remind my fren anything that has got to do with her...count me out...bla bla bla..bark bark bark...frenz of mine might not be as 'much' as u do...but so what...haha...i dont make frenz with dogs and cats on the road...feeling angry reading this ?!!? dont read la..there is a X button on the top right...click on it...u will be out of this place...GET LOST !!! told u u are not welcome here..dunno why so thick skin still come back my blog...haiiz...bo bian la..u thick skin i also canot do anything...not my face also...up to u la...bla bla bla...bark bark bark

[beiteuygina]
*which hse dog is barking ar ?!!?

2004-08-09T15:43:00.000+08:00

finally got to use internet again..my com infected with dunno what popup..manage to quarantine it...den can use liao !! hmm...wanted to blog yesterday de..but today com den ok...hope i wun forget what i wann say yesterday coz yesterday can be consider as the golden age of my life...haha !! well..yesterday met herat pasir ris mrt..den went bugis together to meet her fren..did some casual talking on the way...reach orchard in half and hr ba...went taka cold storage to meet some fren..felt so extra..coz all girls !!! tot geraldine would be there so i wun feel left out..but she wasnt !! haha...nvm la..did some shopping with those japs..the way they spend money hor...like we drink water like that..haha !! finally got meet jery and asayo..at cineleisure..den we went pretty in tokyo to take pictures...process was fun...but past fast...but overall was great !! will keep those neoprints forever de...handle with care !!! next we went back to hotel..den met up with chung hong at the hotel...they went up to change to bath and dunno do what...so long...so me and chung hong decided to go buy smthing for asayo...although last min..but sgot the heart can le...sincerity counts..lol !! went to buy a watch with fruits attached...bought liao..sat at the hotel sofa..den we start to think...can fit asayo hand not..if canot how ?!?! haha..alot of stupid idea..chung hong said the perfume someone sprayed was nice..den i told him i just farted..haha !! so funny !! 1 hr plus later..they came down le..finally !! asayo in her jap traditional dress...so nice !! den we tok photo together...and u noe what ?!!? smthing very strange happen !! dont tell u !!!! haha...only chung hong me , john and and a girl noe...blez !! it's a secret..all fated de la...u all noe liao will also find it strange...didnt realise got smthing like this until we were looking thru the fotos...haha !! well..left the hotel to pasir ris..to meet john..walked to mrt with chung hong and her...didnt really tok to them..mayb coz of her presence...didnt really tok much..but smthing happened at the mrt which made me damn bloody fed up..someone just put words into my mouth loh !! didnt want to argue back...coz i noe it's pointless..so i just kept my mouth shut..haiiz..very sad loh !!

next...was at the airport with john and chung hong...andrei joined us for a while...walked here and there waiting for the arrival of the japs...manage to meet up with jerry first...minute later...japs were here..went over to tok to them...dunno why suddenly dont feel like letting asayo go...confirm will miss her de..!! but she very funny...she doesnt remember me by my name..she remembe rme by takeshi ( jing chen wu ) haha...so funny lo !! she see me only..takeshi here takeshi there...cute sia !! they took very long to check in at the dunno what thing la..haha..she was out...and we took photo..stood next to her leh..haha honoured !! after the picture hor..she burst into tears..felt like crying...but not on the outside.on the inside...miss her so much all of a sudden !! asayo...i miss u !!! do come back if u can...i go japan will find u de !! haha...!! anyway...almost all the japs cried..coral students also cried...haiyo...dont sad la ...yu guo tian qing...haha dont think so much...at least u all made new frenz...at least u live meaningfully liao ma..next time if u feel like committing suicide...think again..is there nth in this world that will make u stay ? den u think of ur jap frenz...den wun wan to die liao...haha crap hor !!!! anyway...no matter cry until how jia lat..they still have to go ..ji an shun bian la...heehee !! after giving a hug to lynn...me john and chung hong walked off le...was looking thru at the photos we have taken for the day...recalling happy memories that tok place in the afternoon...everything was so sweet and pleasant !!

msg to asayo : hey..guess now back in japan le ba..noe u dont get to see this msg..but just write it out la...haha...i hope u enjoyed ur stay in singapore although i not ur host la..haha !! although nv really tok much or go out together...but feel that we can be very gd frenz de...just that...just that...fact is u have to go back to japan..anyway...what's important is to have happy memories in sg...all of us have happy memories...well die also wun forget !! and also..i felt that it's a bit wasted that u have to leave yesterday if not sure bring u go see firework...or enjoyed sg nationl day parade..wasted !! me will write snail mail to u also de..dont worry !! forever frenz !! last of all...all the best to u k..study hard in japan and come back here if u can..take vry gd care of yourself...stay cute and funky...although u abit blur blur...but thats what makes u special ma...haha !! hope u will remember me also...hope u like the watch me and chung hong bought for u...hope will remembeer takeshi...hope u will remember the picture of me in my ezlink which makes u go laughing away when u see...hope to see u again !! thanks for being my fren...domo arigato gozaimasu !! take care my drer fren !! i miss u...

before i end this post...i recalled smthing...smthing that med me very sad...pondering whether is true or whether is a joke..on the way back to pasir ris..she said that i was extra in the photo...dunno if she joking anot la..but i juz wanna say...anybody in this world can say me..i dont mind...it will go in frm my left ear and leave at the right...but..whatever thing u say...it will stuck in my brain forvever...forever and ever !! anything that comes out frm ur mouth means alot to me..even it's just a simple hello...!! i dont know if u enjoyed ur day yesterday...u might not enjoyed it coz i was there...i dunno la..maybe i was over-sensitve as i always am towards u...!! but all i noe is...yesterday i really enjoyed myself !! i really really do...i never am this happy before..even going out with my chiongster frenz also canot compared to few hrs of yesterday...im glad u agree to let me go with u all...im glad u dont mind me being with u all..im glad u wasnt angry with me for insisitng to wait for u at the mrt station...im glad u laugh at my jokes..im glad u made my day...im glad to spent a day with u...im glad u are my fren...im glad for u are everything i need to carry on living in this world...im glad u are willing to take photos with me...im glag u allowed me to stand beside u...im glad...im glad...im glad that i didnt made a wasted trip yesterday...im glad u took the iniiative to talk to me...im glad u ask for my opinion..im glad u asked if i wanna eat...im glad u concern abt my stomach knowing that i had not had my lunch...im glad u talked to me when the japs were shopping...im glad u told me to follow u when u were going upstairs..im glad u were involve in my topics...im glad u asked me along when u were going to meet jerry...im glad u treat me well yesterday...im glad to see u smile yesterday...im glad that u went home safely yesterday...im glad we took picture together...im glad i had such a wonderful day with u..im glad u consider me as your fren...im glad u joke with me...im glad u teased me...im glad u told me u will be late...im glad we talked alot...im glad everything went smoothly yesterday..im glad i noe u...im glad i carried the plastic bag for u while u were cutting those photos..im glad u design me with the neoprint machine...im glad im not left out by u...im glad i was wrong that i will be left out..im glad i opened the door for u...I AM GLAD !!! but everything would be much better...if u would accept me...i really hope u would give me a chance to prove that i will make u the happiest and most fortunate woman in the world...give me a chance to prove my love for u...give me a chance to prove to others that i deserve u...just ONE chance...just ONE will do...

[terriblylovesick]
*the day i will stop missing u...is the day im dead...

2004-08-09T15:35:00.000+08:00

i realised smthing...i realised that i cant live without her..i realised that life will be incomplete without her...the minute she is out of my sight..i would miss her like i nv see her for decades !! after she alight yesterday...im already missing her as if..as if...yrs never see her..den feel like picking up fone to call her to meet her !! but i didnt..coz i know someone will spoil my plan..haiiz !!

[goingcrazy]
*where did i offend u ? why must u do this to me ?

2004-08-09T15:15:00.000+08:00

many things have happen recently..dunno where and which to start..well maybe i shall start off abt my tag board stuff !! hmm..got this person..tag at my board saying things abt me..i dont blame u..coz u are siding HER ma..i mean...those that side me..will stand by me and those that side HER will stand by her..this kind of thing i expected le..it's only sooner or later..but if i tag back and scold u..i dont think it will stop...coz u are just being childish..why get myself involve and get childish too..and whether the dream of my girl..deserve me or not..is not up to u to decide unless u her father la..it's up to her..even if she dont accept me..at least it's her decision i respect it..somemore..the person i break with is not u..SHE nv even come my tag board and bark..but why u ? she can accept the fact i broke off with her...accept the fact that i like my dream girl..can accept FACTS..but why cant u..u are not even involve loh..why come here and bark..?!! i dont know whether u got play those beng kind wan not ...but i already wash hand le..although wash le..but i can say one thing loh..if u still not happy with me..for dunno whatever reason...i got only 3 words for u..wu ji lai !! i wont fight or what la..just come talk face to face la..if u got guts..why tag liao dont put your name...tag here tag there waste of time..not happy can talk slowly..solve everything..we might not need to be frenz..just solve ur unhappiness can le...if u die die also want to play black..den u can come try lohz...

this is for HER...if u stil got come back to my blog...i noe it's not ur fault..i nv say it was..but u also cant say its not ur fault TOTALLY..ur fren come here and tag..u also have a part...partly ur fault also..dont u think so ? if u nv tell ur fren these and that...or maybe u told ur fren an imcomplete story...or maybe ur frenz doesnt noe my story...will ur fren come here and tag those nonsense...u get it ? im not trying to put blame on u..just wanna let u noe..what u are doing..or what ur frenz are doing...will make u lose frenz..those that are close to u might not leave u...but u will nv noe...gradually...some of ur frenz will tend to leave u without u knowing...well..i say all these to u doesnt mean i forgive u le..as what mingming told u..frm today...till the day i die..i will never forgive u !! so stop sms-ing me or what...i will nv reply..u will be doing me a very great favour by leaving me alone..i will be very grateful !!

well...thats all i got to say...the one who tag at my board...i said what i want to say...if u not happy...can find me..it's fine with me...if u continue tagging...i also canot do anything..but it will only show that u are childish and u will spoil ur fren (HER) reputation coz people will know SHE got such a childish fren..last of all..just to remind u...wu ji lai...

[stayingcalm]
*handling things like nv before...not used to it..haha !!

2004-08-08T01:07:00.000+08:00

finally got to use internet le..dont know got what stupiid problem..my dad just helped me fixed..but can see he quite angry !! anyway..just got back frm west plaza not long..went to play basketball to relieve stress..not studies de stress...but another stress la..u all shld noe..feeling very sad over it !! hope my bball frenz can cheer me up..!! played quite badly at first..but slowly play better..was satisfied with how i play loh..didnt make a wasted trip down to the end of pasir ris !! very happy liao..haha !! made some beautiful shots and lay-ups..played 5 0n 5 for last half hr..huoying one team !! haha..except zhi xiang...poor him !! but xiang hor has improved alot le..not bad not bad..keep it up !!

i was expecting her call..cause she was supposed to call me and confirm what time we meet tml..waited till 8+ and i got worried..wondering if she forgot about it..in the end she got call la..but i nv hear coz i was playing bball ma..so wasted !! she sms me also..but i still call her back...haha..die die also want to hear her voice den i happy !! she sounded sleepy..asked if she was sleeping but she say no !! sounded so tired..dunno la..haiiz !! asked her to meet me earlier to go buy present for asayo..she cant make it..haiiz !! chung hong also another ass..told me going going...although he really is going la..but he 4 plus den come..we 1 meet le leh..leave me alone..win liao loh !! actually planned to talk long long de..but she sounded so damn tired loh..dunno real not..haiiz..so hang up loh !!

tml hor..going out with jerry,asayo,lingmiin,doreen and chung hong to orchard..last day the jap students will be here le..after tml..they going back le..hope asayo will remember me..realise that she very friendly and cute !! hmm...got this bad feeling that i will be left out tml..very strong feeling..coz hor..jerry will be with asayo...she will be with doreen..den me leh ?!!? chung hong is suppose to be with me...but 4 onwards la..den frm 1 to 4 leh !?! will i be left out ?!?! recently hor...she had not been replying to my msg leh..haiiz dunno why !! is she avoiding me ?!?! does she noe the truth ?! is she trying to stop friendship between us to get closer ?!?! pray hard it's not !!! dont noe what she busy with also...seem so tired everyday..it's so difficult to noe what she is thinking...i tried ways and ways to find out what she think..but i still cant...everytime i come to a conclusion...there will always be a new clue !! im really very sad over this..have not been studying for past 2 days which i planned to...spent time missing her..spent time pulling myself together...spent time wiping off my tears...!! i dont noe why im thinking all this..maybe im over-sensitive...maybe im thinking too much..maybe i love her too much...or put it in a simplier way..im MISSING her too much !!!

[lovesick] ` like never before
*ill never break your heart..please give me a chance !!

living in dream

2004-08-07T13:57:00.000+08:00

if given a choice..i would prefer living in dream than in reality becoz in dreams..it's always me and her !! just me and her..no one else !! the time we had in my dreams were so sweet and everlasting...nv felt like stopping but my stupiid alarm clock always wake me up for sch !! dreams are fake while reality is real but so long as one is happy..who cares ?!!? furthermore..i can have the type of dreams i want...but reality is all there..arranged for u..u cant change or destroy it !! anyway..now alone at home..editing my blog now..hope it will be nice !! give feedback at the talk cock corner k..thanks !!

[lovesick]
*when will we ever be together

2004-08-06T23:11:00.000+08:00

tears kept flowing down the moment i think of her !! i miss her like crazy..it just cant stop !! i wondered..after doing so much for her..was i ever allowed to place one of my foot in her heart..am i allowed to hide in one small corner of her heart...am i allowed to help mend her heart if it's broken ?!?! am i even allowed to share the burdens she has ?!!? indeed i did cried for her..am i useless..silly or foolish ?!? coz i cried for someone who has not even loved me..i guess..!! well..my fren said boys seldom cry for girls..but i think it is nth wrong..it's just that boys usually dont show it out only..guys usually cry in the heart not on the outside !! but me..dunno why la..both inside and outside also have !! haiiz..felt so helpless..

[seriouslovesick]
*will i go mad one day ? im missing her like never before..

2004-08-06T18:51:00.000+08:00

wa lao...buey tahan leh..jacky and gilbert playing ps2 in my room now !! gilbert f***ing kao bei !! feel like smacking him..i will...i will !! haha..dont tell him !! hmm...nv study at all today..no mood !! all my mood is spent on missing her..!! today sch half day only..actually dont wan go de..coz got not much chance to see her..but went in the end..why ?!!?! coz hor..can see her 5 min ma..see her 5 min i also happy !! crazy hor..?!!? go sch 2 hr..see her 5 min happy liao !! yup im really crazy over her !! luckily manage to talk to her for a while...if not really is a wasted trip !! haha !! went to sch and sat near the jap girl..feel that she very friendly..told her i jing chen wu !! haha..so funny..she very cute la !! keep looking at her secretly..hehee..finally she walked over telling asayo she going hall le..den manage to tok to her..blez !! the parade was boring like hell...but the tkd not bad la..attract my attention..the rest was like...sleeping lo !! well..planned to sneak into hall to see her de..but was chased out of sch my teachers..kaoz..scared what..as if got terrorist..sai wan leh !! didnt wan to go home so early..so went to pay bball outside sch..30 min only la..den went white sand with xw le !! saw alot people there..the whole grp of renzhe plus wei rong and hong ru..saw zhiyong weijie kavin and kwok hung also !! dunno whcih idiot throw the plank down almost hit me..lucky i siam fast..xw manage to chop the plank into pieces but no one believe !! haha...poor xw have to go 2nd floor to demo to wei rong..but the plank too small liao !! went back with hou meng..saw xiang on the way to interhange..talk talk...den go back le !! hou meng come my hse play..but went his hse 1st to take counter strike cd..msg john on the way..ask if they all release le not..it's ard 12 plus le hor..they still have a long way to go !! what the fish ?!?! well..think hou meng had a fun time here ba..oh ya..she call me leh !!! wa shocking sia..haha !! coz morning i call her ma..left smthing in sch want her to pass to me..but she nv bring fone to sch..i guess..so she called me when she reach home..haha !! sms a while with her..and will be calling her tonite !! yyyiipppeee...!! time pls fly faster..!! i wanna call her tonight !! blez !! wish me gd luck !!

[callinghertonight]
*4 days of holiday will make me more mad over u...i really miss u !!

2004-08-05T21:33:00.000+08:00

u noe what..?!?! i feel like crying now..crying for someone who have not done anything for me..someone who has not gave me warmth and love..someone who doesnt appreciate all i have done..but why ?!!? i myself also dunno why..i suddenly miss her so much !! i really do !! just missing her is enuff to make tears roll down my cheeks loh !! i really miss u !! I DO I DO !!

[cryingboy]
*i fell into the hole alone..will she be down with me or pull me out with her ?!?!

2004-08-05T18:45:00.000+08:00

aloha..!! just got back not long only..today sch was cool !! had japanese invasion..haha no la..got students frm japan come our sch..cultural exchange programme !! well..our class de..got one boy and girl..both not bad la..avg looking..but most imp is they very friendly !! sort of bully them abit..but not too much la !! told the girl i was jing chen wu !! told her ayumi hamasaki my girlfren..!! haha..!! so funny !! during recess..we played bball with 2 of the japs..!! haha..so many people wanted play...but me hor..is people invite me play de..haha why ?!!? coz all star ma..bo bian !! blez !! haha..!! didnt run much la..didnt wan to sweat alot..but hor only i score leh !! received a great pass frm john..turn ard..without hesitation..jumped up with little effort..release the ball as usual..ball went in smoothly like it always do..walked off confidently and proudly !! haha..!! made singapore proud leh..dont pray pray hor !! haha !! but all this hor...canot be compared to the last 20 min i had in class !! the happiest moment in my life !! had geo lesson..and we were suppose to divide ourselves in 2 big group and will be taught be 2 different teachers..was in the same grp as her !! didnt expect her to sit next to me..was happy but acted cool !! haha..!! xinwei is a cb coz he told me very squeezy and told me to move inner abit..haha but i knew he meant well !! wahahhaa..!! nvm la..forgive u la xinwei !! haha..!! was finding all sort of topic to talk to her..racking my brains to make her laugh..using up my brain juice just to tok to her..ask her qns even if noe the answers !! all i wanted was to hear her voice..!! well..achieve most of that..was very contented !! good time usually fly fast..20 mins is like 5 mins to me !! everything is so fast !! frm now on..im looking forward to every geo lesson..coz it's equivilant to looking forward to my happiness..looking forward to sitting with her.and looking forward to be close to her !! haha..I LOVE GEOGRAPHY !!!

[veryverycontented]
*how i wish everyday's lesson is geography !! i love geography !!

2004-08-03T23:27:00.000+08:00

so happy..hear a news frm someone..gd news..!! canot say la..confidential..haha !! erm got to noe that she like my cd..cd that i burned for her..!! so happy..life is getting better and better especially after some jinx left my life..im getting happier and happier each day feeling more and more blessed !! i miss her !!!

2004-08-03T23:07:00.000+08:00

yo yo yo !! today sch so fun !! haha..suppose to have physics test but hor the morning rehearsal for speech day took it away !! but postpone to tml..haha sama sama la !! went back for chinese..so boring..watch di xia tie..miss her so much !! after chi..had chem in class..didnt even bother to listen to him tock cock loh !! he ask me and john they all to shut up and i still ask WHY as if im not in wrong..haha !! didnt mean it to be a joke but got people laugh..haha !! after that was melvin's lesson..think he damn du lan with our class..haha !! we keep asking why loh..even for the simplest thing we ask why..den we keep toking abt mariane choong which he told us not to read coz some of the fatcs not true..but we keep saying..mariane choong say this mariane choong say that..haha !! den after sch also..hlaf the class go for speech day and cg le ma..den hor..got the half hor..suppose to go.but out of the hlaf..3/4 nv go..including me la..haha den he du lan he cancel the lesson and left !! so funny loh !! we were at the 2nd level..tot he would saw us..but we squatted down..haha !! had eng after recess...found out tracy was my ho pang yao..haha !! but keep threatening with my work...blez !! for the sake of her..let her threaten nvm la..worth it !! haha..we were playing the game of interviewing..interviewed her..wasnt fun at all..but toking to her was !! tracy asked winna who she interviewed..she said me..she ask wad would i like to change..i said my look..and what would i do if i achieve that..den someone said..woo the girl of his dream...suddenly hor..the class so quiet loh..i dont even dare look at her...so pai seh !! think the whole class noe la..haha keep quiet only..thanks arh !! assembly was boring like hell..felt asleep but saliva came flowing out..haha !! had social studies..sat close to her and chatted..!! waited for her after sch..but they so late..so left with terence and chung hong they all first !! recalling the speech day performance by tkd..especially keegan !! think of it i wanna laugh !! he suppose to kick 4 planks..arrange in 360 degrees la..kicked the 1st,2nd and 3rd by scolding LAM PA before kicking..haha !! missed the 4th one..coz i think giddy le la..prepare himself again by scolding CB den LP again..haha..finish with a cool stance..lol !! not bad la shorty..!! oh ya..this one canot be left out..we were toking abt one physics teacher..said that she can have a album of hers..with number hits called 'cher cher cher' and techno trance ' it takes 2 hand to clap' together with track3 name 'flexibility' and with a classical music called ' sometimes i really dont understand what u all are thinking' plus an exclusive bonus track of ' la laa LAA LAAAA' haha !! damn funny lo..u all might not get the joke here..but it's really very funny !! haha....

2004-08-02T17:40:00.000+08:00

went to sch with new specs !! haha..expect alot of comments frm frenz but not very la..haha quite disappointed though !! anyway sch was fun today..!! started off with mother tongue..watched 'the others' !! so funny..doreen was afraid like hell loh..den when the most scary part..i just tapped her on the back and she scream !! nv did i expect..she cried !! OMG !! haha..went to console her..provide her with tissues..hao bu rong yi den stop her crying..den go back class hor..told her that i made her best fren cry..haha !! walked over to doreen's place..found out she cry AGAIN !?! what hell fish ?!!? haha..provide her with tissue again..spent 10 mins to stop her crying..den the class hor very fish de leh..keep teasing her abt the movie tingy..tryin to make her cry !! tolong la..i spent 15 mins leh..not easy task k..heehee !! during maths teacher nv come so had free period..tried toking to her but didnt !! cme hor..sat with jerry..tok alot la..haha confidential !! after recess was abit bored la..chem and physics !! but eng hor..my class was chaos loh !! tracy no free ma so nv come..no relief teacher also !! dunno why suddenly peizhen went haywire..went ard kissing people..first was xin wei...siao wan leh !! she aimed chang siang...den john and some of the rest was like pinnin him on the wall..the whole was shouting ' qing zui ! qing zui !! ' den i shouted..' shang chuang shang chuang !! ' so funny sia..but on 2nd tot..where got bed..so i edited ' shang zhuo shang zhuo !! ' haha !! damn kuku loh..!! suddenly hor peizhen aim me !! siao wan leh..told her i knew CHINESE KUNG FU !! haha..said ' bo cold leng ' (hokkien : impossible) in a slang..dunno why everybody luff..!! siao wan..so mad loh the class !! well had geo after sch..sat behind her coz carline went for appointment ma..increase the chance of toking to her !! heehee so happy..!! asked i look like ping guan not..with the specs..she said ya..the SPECS only..(-_-') !! haha..said ping guan zhen ren jun zi..fine fine !! blez !! next..pe hor..nv play much la..didnt want to spoil my new specs !! but hor before we started..we had difficulties clearing the court for girls..xw went to tok to them nicely but failed..bo bian..me go..raised my voice..alot people say frm behind looks like wanna fight liao..but in fact me toking quite nicely to them liao loh !! think ruin my hao nan ren image in front of her..hope she understand..haha !! well..pe half way went to comment on the girls game..tok alot of crap..well even though is crap but she laughed loh..haha !! after pe..got to realised she angry with someone..dunno what happen also..say bye to her but she ignore me..!! i noe she nv see my blog de but i just want to say that no matter what..if at times u feel sad or angry..dont forget i will always be there for u !! no matter midnight or morning..just for u..my service is 24 hrs !! might not be very close frenz with u but im willing to do anything for u !! i hope u are fine loh..although i dunno what happen but bi jing u all is frenz ma..so..ya..erm..dont think so much la..even if the whole world turn against u..i will still be on ur side standing strong with u !!

went to read some stranger's blog coz peiyi told me someone wrote abt me..wasted so much time reading..anyway last time liao..nvm liao !! realised that stranger got the ability to tok cock !! can be lawyer also..can make things frm black to white..hmmm..not bad..potential !! time prove me wrong ?!? haha..so what if it prove me wrong..i still hate u !! aiyah..this kind of thing i also noe..write in blog..act innocent..let people pity me..who dunno !! pui !! i can also ask john and keith..was i that bad ?!? confirm they say no la..why best frenz ma !! stupid..!! go conduct one survey la..tok cock only !! nv learn social studies arh..out of the sch population..only got one or two say u good only..but not majority leh !! sai !! god damn it..feel so childish arguing with her !! waste my damn bloody time quarrelling with a bitch !! tok abt her only spoil my mood...JESUS CRIES ?!?! think ah mi tuo fo better..cool me down !! haha..LOSER !! SCRAM !! EVERYONE NOE UR TRUE COLOURS !! STOP ACTING INNOCENT !! oh man..so childish..think i better stop !!

[ah mi tuo fo]
*time will prove u wrong bla bla bla..piece of shiit !! loser !!

2004-08-01T07:16:00.000+08:00

zzzzzz...aloha..!! so tired !! just came back frm bear's bbq..si bei siian !! nth to do there so went to play bball and pull some ring..haha the ring there so short..can hang there sia !! but got my hand blistered in the end..hehee nvm la !!jaslin was there as well..talked and confided quite alot in her..must admit she yue da yue chio..more mature liao..very pretty now..!! haha..!! well..got to noe smthing frm one of my fren..u all dunno de !! after hearing what the person has told me..i suddenly felt so gullible..i was cheated for so long and yet i dunno..all those phrases like ' i will wait for u' , ' i still love u ' , ' i need u ' or ' i miss u ' all is SAI AND BULLSHIIT wan la !! this kind of nice words hor..when stead hor..say only..but when break..u see loh..very fast hor..the person will like another person liao..now den i realise how stupiid and foolish i was..initially i tot i was very bad..but in the end i found out the most wicked one isnt me..but her !! i got to noe she like someone else loh and got proof that she admitted it !! got one thing more absurd but it's a bit too personal so i prefer not to disclose..!! erm..anyway..was quite happy also...coz i finally got to noe her true colours..!! i dont noe what are her intentions for doing so..but all i noe is the more she do those kind of thngs (maybe to attract attention) the more i hate her !!

after finding out the 2 fresh piece of news..felt like crying not becoz i miss her..but becoz my feeling was being played for 6 mths..i suddenly realise that im so gullible..im so foolish..if i nv stead with her..all these wud not happn at all..so people who are hurt or suffered due to this incident ( excluding gy )..i say sorry to u all !!! pls forgive me...!!

anyway..ive made up my mind not to have any thing to do with her anymore..she want to die or what is her prb..she go her nan tian men i go mine nai he qiao..we 2 gu bu xiang qian !! frm now onwards..sunday morning 7.30am..i swear not to have any ties with her anymore..i will not forgive her even i die..i will take it that i dont have this fren at all..well got smthing for her..just remember that i will always be there for u when ur frenz found out the truth and leave u coz i wanna be the first to mock at u !!! LOSER...!!!

p.s this will be the last post abt that b***h..coz i dont wan so many unhappy memories inside my blog..

[pissedoff]
*ure just a low class shameless cheap b***h...

2004-07-31T18:23:00.000+08:00

aloha !! finally got the chance to use com..!! si bei siian leh this morning..went sch for oral !! atrocious leh..went at 8 hor..12 den my turn leh..lao tian ye arh..haha !! well..did quite well for it..but dunno how the teacher think of it loh..!! didnt tok much to her today..wore the pouch she gave me to sch..walked up to her and told her i risked my life to bring the cd for her..well she return a smile and thats all..after that nv tok liao..hope she notice that i wore the pouch..haha delirately walked a few rounds in front of her..if she nv notice den i consider failure liao !! haha !! came back after having lunch with botak lim and terence at 201..so tiring..no one online also..sms her also nv reply..either she busy or she nv on her fone..nvm la..later den call her..coz i going bbq ma..den someone i dont like might be going..so in order to keep myself entertained..i plan to call her at nite loh..hope she is free !! anyway watched jue zhong hao nan ren..very nice but i fell asleep halfway..haha..woke up at the ending part..den rewind to see the middle part again..haha stupiid hor !! and also im burning 2 disc..one chi one eng..both very nice..hope to introduce to her..hope she will like it..

share another thing with u all..today hor..me,botak lim,terence and aaron walked to interchange ma..den very funny thing happen !! chang siang told me US will be doing flag day at white sand..so i was like..planning how to tease them when i saw them la..didnt saw them there la..but saw some other coralians there..tell u all what i do..we saw yi jia and xiaoni..so i was like going to take out my wallet..den she take her can hor..den i told her my wallet stuck la..canot take out..den walk in front abit..saw patricia..took out my wallet..she place the can in front again..i took out money..but instead of donating..i gave terence 5 dollar lying that i owe him money..haha !! den patricia expression was like..huh ?!?! what the hell ?!?! haha..so funny !! last of all hor..saw these sec 2 boys at the interchange.they were sitting down ma..so we walked over..looking at the can..den i told terence they all to donate..my hands went into my pocket as if i were looking for coins..but as they were abt to stand up and wait for us to donate..we walked away..haha !! so funny lohz..their expressions..haha !! u all must be there den can understand..after that hor..i swear nv to do flag day in my life !! haha..if not later all of them revenge..bad hor me..heehee !! but it's fun !!! blez !!!

haha k need to go do some work le..at nite going bbq..ton somemore..!! also want to go miss her le..that's all folks !! c'ya..

[lovesick]

*do u noe how imp u are to me ?

2004-07-30T23:46:00.000+08:00

i canot tahan anymore liao..!! more and more people is complaining to me abt her..now den i realise how wicked she is !! im really blind..haiiz !! very disappointed loh...very very !! first hor..the jasmine things..already very childish liao..childish and lame to the max !! next..quarrel with winna..calling her a traitor but the whole thing was started by her..few minutes ago..i just go to noe that..she has been writing compo abt her..confirm is say bad thing..also keep saying that she suck..pls leh..she suck ?!?! den u leh ?!?! angel arh ?!!? u very gd meh ?!?! just another peice of shiit...shamless b***h !! when will u ever stop being so childish and lame ?!?! just for ur information..u might think that the whole world is siding u because u noe how to cry with crocodile tears..fake tears that make people pity u..but the thing u nv noe is more and more people is hating u each day..u can choose not to believe me..up to u !! it;s just for ur info and anyone else who is interested..i really have to take my cap off u..think u can join star search liao..want to cry can cry liao..dun think zoe tay aso noe how to do that..u cry with crocodile tears better den her sia..!! but sorry la hor..u can trick others..u cant trick me...zi shi bao bu zu huo de..one day...when those that pity u noe the truth..haha !! ami tuo fo..god bless u !! i will be the 1st in this world to laugh at u..i will..!!

[pissedoff]

*some people are just so shameless...

2004-07-30T20:40:00.000+08:00

got to noe that winna and her quarrel..well..winna u did a great job !! claps and claps for u ..dont care about her !! noe u so long..this is the first time im impressed by ur actions !! haha..!! she hor..like to cry and den hor..make people pity her..den tings hor frm black will become white..actually is her fault den will become others fault..!! why ?!!? im used to it..!! all she noe is cry...as u all noe if a girl cry..alot of people sure will pity the girl and side with her de ma..but this method hor..outdate liao la..no matter how u cry..others will noe u are the one who started everything wan loh !! it's obvious it is her fault hor..still want to say winna is a traitor..kaoz !! if u got the guts to start this stupiid nonsense..den u better bloody have the gut to accept what others say about u..u are in the very very wrong loh !! haiiz..really very disappointed..didnt expect u to be someone like this..guess i see the wrong person le..winna ho..last time u keep helping her..console her when she is down..all the effort go down the drain le la !! now u noe what kind of fren is she liao right..!! best to jue jiao with her la..like me..so gd !! when nth hor..she talk to u nicely..when thing happen she call u traitor..!! come to think of it..i think that her character is like the xi ling men show 7pm channel 8 de..that jiaxi..if u all got watch hor..go notice the jiaxi..i find hor the b*** charatcer is the same as her..she say people can..people say her canot !! i hate this kind of the people to the max !! well..dunno what to say la..just wan her to noe hor.she like that will not get people ard her to pity..maybe for the time being la..but when they found out the truth..what u going to lose is not just face..but friends as well..

good news..!!

2004-07-30T20:35:00.000+08:00

well..enuff of the bad news..let's talk abt something gd today !! really gd !! im really happy to have frenz like them...see i told u..no need have many frenz de..as long as have the best one ard can le !! who cares if u have 1000 but all like shiit..i will be satisfied if i have 10 but all are the best !! 1st half of the day hor...siian la..but after recess..wa..power !!! after recess is chinese ma..we all go watch vcd..den her class teacher nv come..they suppose to go hall..but i ask her come my class watch vcd with us..she hesitated..but after john and me de continuous persuasion..she decided to come..enter frm the back coz pai seh..haha..she so shy..so funny !! ask me where to sit..as if they 1st day in coral..haha !! but in the end they still go hall..sad hor..no la..suddenly they walk back to class..suggest to watch in 4e2..haha !! what a gd idea..so i went back to my own class to watch with her..although nv tok much or do anything..but time with her is just great !! great is great la..but time with her also fly very fast..how i wish i can have the power to adjust the speed of the clock..!! we stopped during home room but continued after sch..haha !! no one watch de..only got me,her,doreen and two idiots playing you xi wang card !! haha..!! after that hor..went down lab for science..saw her playing happyily with mok,peizhen and doreen..haha !! saw her happy hor..me gradually also feel happy for her..although she nt playing with me la !! she's such a sweet girl !! here comes the climax..after sci hor..i got to found out that she will be walking home alone !!!! first thing in my mind is run out of the sch..to find her..but nv did i realise that she is still in sch and i ran pass her i also dunno !! funny right..haha !!! well..walked to interchange with her...just me and her..tried my best to slow down the pace of my leg..but she nv slow down..haha !! hope everything in the world wud just stop for us..just for me to wipe off her sweat for her or carry her bag for her..anything will do !! well..we tok alot..the thing im surprise is that she actually took the initiative to start a topic with me..woah !! didnt really expect that but was very happy...nervous at the same time !! heart beating very fast..as if will stop any moment..!! haha..well like what i say..time with her is great but fast..reached the interchange within 10 mins..said a reluctant bye to her..see her walked all the way to the back den turn away..den i quickly run to the front to see her board the bus..haha !! didnt get the chance to see coz the stupidd bus 358 blocked my view !! anyway really enjoyed myself today...and also without support of my frenz..i wouldnt be what i am today i wouldnt even have the chance today..i love u all !!

well..now is the time for my appreciation for my frenz..first of all..i want to thanks geraldine coz she really did a very gd job..without her..no chance for me today !! jerry..i owe u one..if u ever need anything in the future or someone bully u..tell me !! i go up mountain go down sea sure hep u..!! haha..second i wanna thank john..coz once he noe the news..den he ask me faster go..he dont mind i abandon him..same goes to keith and her mother..actually suppose to go back with them de..but in the end nv..felt so pai seh..they nv blame me..!! well..next is mok..saw her and ask where is she..next is edwina sabrina and team !! they supported me..didnt really expect edwina to support me me at this point of time..coz usually we like to argue de ma..heehee..she gave me a thumbs up too !! sabrina gave me a 'felt happy for me' face..well..though nv tok to me..but thanks sabrina..as for team hor..she gave me a pat on my shoulder...the pat of power..haha !! next..still have to thx doreen...if she nv go out with her frenz..today wun be today..thank you doreen !! last of all..have to thank her..coz erm...haha i also dunno why...i just wanna thank her..perhaps she wasnt cold to me..maybe she didnt reject my offer to walk with her to interchange..perhaps she told me alot today..just want to thank her !!

overall..i still need to thank everybody..those that i mention earlier..!! i love u guys..i really do...thanks for being my fren !! i will nv forget u..!! told u all liao..frenz no need alot de..have those that support u can le..just like those of mine...haha !! so i really dont mind losing some of my frenz recently..no regrets coz they aint anything compared to those that i mentioned !! really very happy today...today is a rare chance..well i hope this rare chance pop up everyday !! know i cant be greedy...but i HOPE only ma...haha !! well..i want go miss her liao..that's all folks !!

[lovesick]
*im missing and loving her more and more each day..

bad news..

2004-07-30T15:58:00.000+08:00

well..got bad news and good news today..start off with the bad wan first la..!! it is until today..fri morning..30/7/04..that i found out that i stead with a b***h for 6 mths..and know this b***h for yrs..!! it's definitely to my utmost regret that i noe someone like her..felt totaly disappointed and very angry with her !! well..here's a msg for her and for anyone who is interested..i dont care if u complain to xiang or whoever it is..even if u call ur mother come i also dont give a damn..coz i noe who is right who is wrong..i dont scold people b***h and flare up without any reasons..if i do i will not be here..most probabaly in the mental hosp !! since u wan to play the 'it's your mouth not my mouth' game..i can play as well !! let's see who wins..try me !! u can call all ur frenz to call me bastard or what..dont worry..i wun do anything..coz it's their mouth..not mine !! why would i go bother abt monkeys barking..?? but i will not ask my frenz to call u b***h coz if i do..i will be the same as u..shameless !! didnt expect u to be so CHILDISH !! read ur blog..got the info that u grow up..mature le..felt happy for u..but if this is what u meant by grow up or mature...well i thin u shld check the dictionary again or perhaps go to a optical shop to check if ur eyesight have anything wrong !!! im glad i broke off with her..had regrets initially..but after today incident..weeessshh...my imgae of her..sweet nice and caring girl..turn to a shameless childish b***h !!! didnt have any regrets now..felt relieved though..!! oh ya..u might feel angry after reading this..call anyone u like..beat me up what..kill me also can..but as long as im alive..as long as there is still me..in my heart..u will always be a b***h !!! if u want me to stop..KILL ME !! i just dont get it..why must u jasmine by her name ?!?! fun ?!?! thrilling ?!?! bored ?!?! or u just simply dont have brains !! well bet u dont have one..!! lucky me going to graduate liao..after graduation dont have to see ur face anymore !! makes me puke seeing u now...!! lucky i almost finish my food before scolding u today..if not waste money arh !! most of my frenz knew what happen and all went speechless with mouth wide..they too cant believe u actually did that..well..guess that is ur true colours..if that is the case..den i really have to pity u coz for the past 6 mths..uve been putting on a fake mask !!! some say u trying to attract my attention...but i dont care what ur intentions are..i just noe..by doing this..u are only downgrading urself frm a loveable girl to a b***h !! if u want to continue calling jasmine that name..well..u are just adding oil to the fire..scolding u b***h will just be the beginning..there will still be more to come !! u noe me..try me..!! i noe i cant stop u coz it ur damn bloody stinking mouth...but if one day..the thing get worst...i make sure u are going to pay for it !! hmm...think thats abt it..got alot to say de..but dunno why sit in front of com suddenly all gone liao..!! anyway we 2 can never ever be frenz anymore...never ever..hope u will erase me in ur phonebook and msn...coz ive already did !! i will just take it i nv ever noe u before...

2004-07-29T18:07:00.000+08:00

jasmine..sorry leh..i dont wan keep u as gan mei liao..it's a waste for me and it's a misfortune for u also..since u are HER gan mei le..den be it..i dont want to have anything to do with HER..i wanna to break off whatever ties i have with her..even the same gan mei..think we 2 be fren la..hmm..aiyah see fate la..if we can be fren den be loh..canot den nvm..let nature take its course !! ure sweet and cute.study hard !! take care..

2004-07-29T17:40:00.000+08:00

hmm..smthing happen yesterday..nv really expect this day to come but since it has occur..let it be !! i dont care what others are saying behind my back..they can say im a bastard or say im cheap..whatever it is..i dont mind..let them say !! i also dont mind losing frenz which are not worth keeping as long as i kept those that i want ard me..im satisfied !! true..i might not be andy lau (u noe who u are) and perhaps i do really look stupiid in both specs and contact lense..but who cares ?!?! u can criticise all u wan scold all u want..it's fine with me !! anyway i will be leaving this sch soon.well by that time i wont have to see their face and they dont have to see mine too !! i really dont mind what u all say..im just following what my heart tells me to do..im not perfect...no one is !! there will surely be someone that like u and someone that hates..same goes for me !! someone hate me is not smthing unusual ma..but who cares ?!?! it's not as if the end of the world it's not as if i have no friend at all..!! i dont mind losing a fren who jump to conclusion and accusing me after listening to one side of the story...but i dont blame u !! the mouth belong to u..u can say what u want..sg has freedom of speech..the hand is yours..u can type whatever nick u wan either to insult me or scold me..it's fine coz it's your hand !! i cant do anything abt it ma..!! well...i have no regrets losing those frenz..lose some friends now..go poly make new friends la..poly frenz might even be more understanding...who the hell give a f***ing damn abt our friendship !! i dont..!! i really dont as long as i have those that i want and those that support me ard me...im satisfied !! for those who hate me..sorry to say u have to bear with me for next few mths..after i graduate..i wun be in ur sight anymore..!! by then i would be pursuing my own dream..my dream girl..whatever i wanna achieve..!! my appearance hor..u can say stupiid la nerd la..anything la..fine !! u can even put ur msn nick saying i look like shiit or what...or can also set up anti-me blog..!! so what if im ugly..i dont give a damn if u say i am...why ?!?! coz why must i give a damn to ur comments and critisim abt my appearance..u dont even stand a place in my heart..i will only be sad if someone close to me..someone special to me..said that to me..den i wud take into consideration..but if it's YOU...!?!? who the hell cares ?!?! really...who cares ?!?! well..life for me still have to go on..even without one or two frenz..maybe u all can 'propagand' all ur frenz to hate me..it''s fine..really !! as long as they one i need is still frenz with me can le..i dont mind having only john keith xinwei,geraldine and her coz i noe they will stand by me and support me all the way..not like some who jump to conclusions and accuse me !! as long as i have the best ard me..im satisfied !!

2004-07-29T17:30:00.000+08:00

aloha !! enjoyed myself in school today..really did !! im starting to love sch more and more..not because of the lessons but the time in class..!! started off a bit boring but time flew fast..after recess..some went for mega concert thingy so i sat behind jerry and her with doreen !! tok alot loh..so happy..she even took the initiative to ask me chem qns..first time worzz !! haha..did my very best to help her..neglect my maths work and try to think of the solution for her..!! maths lesson was fast..which was flow by geo !! came a new teacher but we nv give face..create havoc for melvin tan..haha !! the class was so crazy today..so fun too !! well after sch got amc..purposely late for it coz i find it stupiid...haha !! hmm..finish quite early..den i saw john and keith drawing circles on the plain paper which is meant for working..heehe i drew half of the page in circles..so funny !! well..climax of today..stayed back after amc to watch vcd in class together with john,her and some of my classmates !! i think hor 4e2 more and more havoc liao..haha..didnt really tok much to her but enjoyed it being with her !! walked to interchange with john doreen and her..talked alot loh..haha !! things are really getting better le..are we now on the next level ?!?! are we closer frenz now ?!?! i hope so..hope things will get better each day..oh ya amost forgot smthing important !! for heaven sake..i DONT LIKE jasmine !! pls stop spreading ard this rumour..i only want to ask her to be my gan mei only..that simple !! i nv say i like her before..whoever is spreading this pls stop it at once..thank you !!

2004-07-28T17:16:00.000+08:00

yea,,,sch was fun today..was looking forward to the 2nd half of the day coz no lesson ma..mother tonuge watch movie history no teacher..haha !! watched vcd during hist also..was caught by mr loo but heckcare..we continue watch..haha !! last yr liao..nvm la..give chance la.haha thanks arh !! had lesson after sch..maths..but so little people !! some went for mega concert while some went for speech day rehearsal..class was so dead !! lucky got my mp3 to keep me alive..haha !! anyway got to noe this sec1 girl that i long wanted to noe...when this girl came to sch to buy sch bks..means sch haven start yet la..i saw her already..wanted to tail her but lost her in the end..!! i had bball match in the morning that day ma so went sch bio girls liao den go bball match !! haha..she resemble one of my fren..not coral de..but some say she resemble her..frm certain view..look quite alike la..but overall i still think look like my outside fren..whatever it is i want to keep her as gan mei..got this urge to do so.dunno why..maybe fated ba ?!!? haha..got her number today..heehee later sure sms her !! the most shocking thing is she got stead le !! her face hor look 100% innocent loh..didnt really expect her to get involve in bgr..surprising leh !! anyway none of my business also..want keep her as gan mei only.nv say want jio her !! haha..weiiz...jasmine arh..u fortunate leh that i want u be my gan mei.me not anyhow choose wan hor..is specially picked de..not many people can be wan leh..some want i also dont wan..lol !! blez !! she look so sweet loh !! haha..oh ya...almost forgot..waited for geraldine and her den walk to interchange together..quite fun la..doreen mouth cramp..haha !! dunno why..said my hair dunno what..crazy !! my hair long le not nice le..haven go cut yet k..cut liao u dont drool when see me hor..lol !! die la..jesper more and more bhb liao..heehee !! bo bian..stating fact !! lol !!! anyone reading canot tahan wanna beat me ?!?! i also want to beat myself..but i too zi ai liao..cant bear to hit myself..haha !! k la i go bath le..later wanna watch vcd den sms jasmine..heehee !! that's all folks !! bye..

2004-07-27T18:08:00.000+08:00

aloha !! just got home..tiring day indeed !! didnt get to see her for the 1st four period leh..low sia !! geo saw her but also nv tok much !! i still prefer monday where we were toking abt mrs chong pregnant thingy den was like made a fool out of myself to see her laugh !! wel i did that !! a clap for myself..haha !! eng hor we practise oral..damn suay i was chosen to go in front of the class to tok..den they give me thise dman bloody topic..what are my desire ?!?! i was like.what thel hell..aint i suppose to give topics ?!?! didnt tok anyway..haha so embarrassing !! den assembly was like so siian loh..since when coral assembly is interesting ?!?! haha..after sch went for mock exam..sat with jerry..didnt finish coz i was toking all the way..haha blez !! almost fell asleep in the bus on the way home..all alone now !! parents still in hong kong..miss them so much !! wait wait...almost forgot smthing so fun today !! erm..me xin wei and john and tracy (miss tan) were sitting in the canteen toking cock !! haha suddenly we came to this topic abt who we like..john was the first..tracy hor tot MEIZI was john's stead leh..when we told her is pei yi ...she was like HUH !?!? opened her mouth so big..haha !! said john had a bad taste..lol !! next we went to xin wei..john told tracy abt the girl xin wei like..so embarrassing for xin wei !! didnt expect them to say me also loh !! wa lao..after giving ample hint and clue tracy finally noe who the girl is le..she say i got good taste leh !! haha..so happy..tracy say she very sweet !! did tracy taste her before ?!?! haha...LAME !!! tracy was like..wow ..jesper not bad arh..got good taste..haha !! she even ask if we were together but i say no la..must face reality face facts !! haha..soon la i replied..but it's just an excuse to make me happy..just an excuse to let me run away frm the prb !! i noe it's impossible..but i will love her as long as i can..!! i even told tracy i will hand in work on time !! becoz...haha....dont tell u all..secret !! anyway enjoyed toking to tracy..although she sometime in class very guai lan la but she is a very nice teacher !! heehee still missing my parents !!! blez..

good news..!!

2004-07-27T18:03:00.000+08:00

yea..just received a piece of gd news !! finally this thing can be erase frm my mind le..i can finally *ahem at ease le..haha !! someone finally straightened her thoughts le..think she really grow up le..felt happy for her coz at least her brain is starting to function now..haha !!anyway got to thank raymond..dunno what he do la..thank jacky coz think he enlighten her ??!! dunno la haha.just thanks all those who help made her forget me..think xiang and jiaming also...thanks arh !! now that she is bound to let this love go..im ess troubled le..coz everyday have to think when will she give up on me..finally today..27/7/04 is the day !! well..since YOU decided to give it up..show determination and prove to everybody u can do it..dont say say but no action hor !! go find ur own happiness..will feel happy if u find one..sure to give u my blessing..!! might not be very close frenz..but still frenz la..!! since u decided to give up...i also can admit le..haha !! think u noe also le la..what yu gan is bullshiit wan la..i have fallen back to square one again..!! well thats not imp now..most imp is u find ur own happiness and i will be happy for u le..u stil have to thank me hor..if i nv bring u down to 760 u will noe them meh ?!?! haha..so the credit still go to me..lol !! no la..joking la..all the best..

2004-07-27T17:32:00.000+08:00

i really miss you !! i really do..it's a 50/50 risk loh..haiiz !! do u noe how imp u are to me..how powerful ur words are to me ? just a simple hello frm u can make my temper or troubles go away...INSTANTLY !! dont believe ?!!? try it..!! just a hello frm u hor i can tok whole day to my frenz telling them abt it..just a word hello.i can be happy over if for hours loh !! i really can..dont believe ask my closest fren in coral and u will noe..trust me !! time is flying fast..time with u is also decreasing..i really hope time could be stopped..just for the 2 of us to say hello..or a bye !! i dunno why i so stubborn this time but im just following where my hearts want to go..thats what alot people told me..follow what my heart want !! here i am following it..i hope to get a smile in return..!! dont even noe can still keep in touch with u after graduation not..i confirm will want to keep in touch with u but as for u ...i got no idea le..do i stand a place in ur heart ?!!? at the smallest corner ?!?! do i ?!?! it's really hard guessing what ure thinking..sometimes nice sometimes cold to me..i accepted it..for the sake of love..i accepted it..i can accept anything just for u !! even if u want me to stop playing basketball which is my dream la...i really am willing to do so..!! just a word frm u ..!! i really dunno how to explain to u what im thinking..perhaps i dont even have the chance to do so even if i want to..i just hope one day u will understand im always by ur side supporting whatever things u do..encouraging u when u fall..be ur listener when u need one..be there to share ur burden..pls give me a chance to prove my love for u i promise i will make u the happiest and most fortunate girl in the world if not i will be strike by lightning bu de hao si !! haiiz...

does it mean anything ??

2004-07-26T19:13:00.000+08:00

today sch hor..start off very fun..had cme ma.den finish work early so we had free time !! decided to spent time toking cock with geraldine and later mrs choong !! carline ask me whether she was pregnant again..told her to ask but she dont dare so i ask loh !! scared what..!! haha..when i pop out the qn..she 'arm qio' !! zai zai wan la..'arm qio' hor confirms means yes wan la !! so i decided to tok abt her pregnancy all these la..so fun loh !! made everyone ard me laugh until cry..especially someone..!! was discussing how long the delivery took..how much it cost..where the hospt..wad the child name all these bullshiit !! simple simple thing made until funny like hell !! haha..but following lesson siian to max liao !! someone told me something abt someone today !! made me fly over the moon..i dont noe if it meant anything la but i noe it really means alot to me !! really a great piece of news loh !! i hope what's on my mind is really true..i HOPE..haha !! but usually things that i hope dont come true de..haha !! let's wait and see ba..

so siian !!!

2004-07-24T17:28:00.000+08:00

aloha !! so siian now lohz..want to go out no money..want to find someone to tok think they all busy..dunno find who also !! do hw...siian !! slp..waste time !! want to tok to someone but dont think she is free..haiiz !! just siian to the max..have to wait for time to pass to go play bball !! dont noe got people not..go liao no ppl den siian also !! anyway im excited abt the arrival of my new specs next week...went marine parade to buy just now..looks even more yan dao with it !! haha...just cant wait for it to come !! den my contact lense also went go cleaning..whole of next week have to wear specs !! siian..stop here le la..so siian !! go find smthng to do le..cya !

stupiid me...

2004-07-23T17:27:00.000+08:00

think i ruin my impression in front of her today !! dash across the road and was horned by the car..why did i do that ?!! i dont have any idea why i do that also..maybe becoz john did that also ? maybe becoz i wanna die ? maybe becoz i want to prove that im brave ? i really dunno...well think i made a bad decision dashing across the road !! there is smthing goin on in my mind...am i really thinking too much ?!!? way too much...for a little thing only i felt happy i felt chances..but in fact it's all bullshit !! those are lies and excuses i created for myself to make myself happy to run away frm reality !! indeed..things between us are getting better but that doesnt really mean anything loh..perphaps we are just fated to be FRIENDS...

2004-07-21T17:26:00.000+08:00

so tiring today loh !! kaoz..feel like slping whole day !! anyway i gave attitude to botak lim today coz he shouted at me ma..he say my parents nv sign report book...haha..how i noe !! they saw the book how i noe they nv sign den pass back to me ?!?! so i shouted back..den he kao bei my hair..den i gave him attitude..get on his nerves !! haha..so fun !! didnt really tot of the consequences if he bought me to sundram but i just defiant him !! he still threaten me with my testimonial...ask him dont bullshiit la !! stop threatening me..im not a single scared loh..dont come tok cock and threaten me with it..!! u can try me !! haha..den hor got ppl fight in chem lab also..really made my day,,,made me so alert that i paid attention to the fight but not the lesson..it was so fun..haha actually i also involove de..i mean i wanna get involved la..but that asshole la..nv tell me he want to go whack the other guy liao..den i sitting very far ma..so when they started..i was too far away frm the scene..i want to go but teacher shouted le...what a waste !! my punches are so rusty...heehee !! the rest of the day was like f*** so siian and tiring !! anyway today hor..haiiz..really is yi chang huan xi yi chang kong la..!! why ?!!? haha..dont tell u all..only those close to me noe only..blez !!

what a WASTE !!

2004-07-20T18:30:00.000+08:00

aloha !! just came back frm sch..so tiredz !! so many test today..look thru the books only !! the weather today suck to the max loh..before assembly was raining like f*** but when 2 period of assembly is over..the weather was so damn bloody hot loh..seems like never even rain before..the floor was VERY DRY !! can u imagine how hot the weather is ?!?! god damn it...!! but my day was somehow brighten up by someone who did something ...haha !! i canot reveal too much la..my frenz noe can le..i really cannot believe my ears !! felt like pinching myself to check whether i was dreaming but i didnt cause i noe im not dreaming !! talked quite alot today..had meeting with fantasy and finally came to a conclusion..guess some were happy some were sad..got sweets frm desmond and i was like going ard the sch distributing the sweets...skinny santa...hohohohoho !! didnt really understand what ancillory service meant so got 'him' to teach me..although still dont quite get it but at least she made the effort to explain to me !! test was like shiit...wasted half an hr wiping off my sweat before doing the mock exam...source based some more..where got time ?!?! So...i nv finish loh..haha !! weather spoil all my mood..just dont feel like doing anything just feel like going home to take a shower den slp !! FAT HOPE ...!! anyway me john xw and 'him' were the last few...nv finish my geo but handed in..ran out to see if someone is somehow there doing something..haha..but no sign of 'him' !! had a feeling that 'he' is still in sch so waited but to my dismay...haiiz !! i MISSED it !! i dunno how to say la...canot reveal so much also..just feeling so wasted right now !! but also HAPPY at the same time..haha...

MISS ME !?!?

2004-07-19T02:03:00.000+08:00

aloha!!! anybody miss me ?!?! haha..very long nv blog le leh..coz hor my inside the com canot go internet..dunno why !! stupid wan laz..den outside com also sot sot wan..!! think they fixed the outside com le...so now i using outside com loh !! very fast hor,,one week like that pass le..nth specia happen during the week la..had fun in sch..enjoy talking to frenz especially during lessons..the challenge of running away frm discipline master becoz of my hair !! haha...think now left 112 days to o levels le...very fast hor !! i so gan jiong leh..den hor dunno why i suddenly like to do maths paper 1 very much leh..whenever i free hor den will take my tys and do..but only paper 1 !! think im addicted !!! now hor everyday day at least 4 den release leh..so tiring loh..want to play bball also must wait till sat !! had fun yesterday...playing bball with my frenz..so long nv play with them le..they still as good !! unlike me..deprove like siao !! so sad...oh ya...had my chinese oral last week...it was terrible !! the reading part was fantastic but when come to topic..die !! the teacher ask abt emailing and a hundred plus couple went to do volunteering work...die !!! i stare at the teacher with my mouth wide open...the teacher also stare back...they both doesnt seem to want to help me at all...took them so long to hint me some questions !! were they mesmerised by my handsome lookinng face ?!?! haha..jk laz..!!! erm..dunno wad to say leh...actually had alot of things to say de...but all forgot le...mixture of feelings..sad..happy..disappointed..anxious and excited...haha...canot recall what really happen la...oh ya by the way...i guess my prb is solved..what problem ??!!? only those close to me will noe...erm or shld i say VERY close...haha..coz not many people noe la !! i very lazy to parahgraph my post wan la..so i want to say what hor just shoot out...haha so u can see mine post hor...tok here..den suddenly change topic den later change back again...haha very messy de la !! yea...my team go buy jersey le !! huoying ROCKS !!! think i say before but i say again coz im so proud of my team !! i really am...although my team is ah beng team la..but they really very gd !! anyone interested to have a friendly match ?!?! contact me k ?!?! dont worry la..wun fight de...got me ma !! no.1 peacemaker !! haha...erm still got what arh...let me think...i noe le !! huihui hor..was selected for singapore floorball team leh !! pro hor..oi..dont just read leh...clap la !! not easy leh...SINGAPORE leh..what u waiting for ?!?! C-L-A-P !!!! which part of the clap did u not understand ?!?! haha...im mad !! but i feel so happy for her...guess all her frenz does ba !! never see her play before leh...but can go sg team must be very gd liao loh !! so proud of her !! last of all..today went to watch fantasy match against east spring sec..it was huihui's last game also coz she has to focus on floorball !! well..the match started quite bad but after 2nd half things started to change..the team was more organised !! guess they realised how the pressure feels like playing with an organised sch team ba..well...to me...i think all players did they very best which is worth clapping also la !! clap....NOW !!! all players played their very best...although quite a number of missed shots..but its fine...it really is...if u lose the ball...defence and get it back...!!! today i see them play hor...is the best liao..usually when training see them slack her slack there de !! haha now know not easy liao right...tough hor ?!? so must train harder la !! i believe u all can do better than this...all u need is more experience !! they win because they had more experience than u people..but whatever it is..it doesnt really matter whether u win or lose as long as u did ur best..it's enough !! win of coz is gd la..but lose also gd ma...let u have experience...at least u guys will noe where your standard lies between yourselves and an organised sch team !! correct ?!?! so look onthe brighter side of life..lose is not the end of the world..ask for a rematch after o and thrash them like KIDS !!! no matter what...just be happy with what u are doing...love yourself...LOVE THE GAME !!!

2004-07-11T23:57:00.000+08:00

yyiipppee !!! got my new mp3 le..can store 1.5 gig de files leh !! so fun !! but spend the whole night figuring hwo to use the damn bloody organiser which can create playlist in my mp3..haha..finally done with it !! now my mp3 got 79 songs le hor..but space used up is not even one quarter..haha !! den hor maybe me changing phone to x430 !! haha..coz hor my mother plan ending le den want to extend or smthing..den can buy the x430 at price of 98 only !! den i pass my STUPPIID s500 to my younger brother !! haha...hope jonas is willing to do so..if not i WHACK HIM UPSIDE DOWN INSIDE OUT !!! haha...

2004-07-11T13:06:00.000+08:00

yesterday mingmin ask me abt my opinion of life..she was rushing me so i anyhow han tam one for her..i said that the things that we want are usually the hardest thing to get and most of the time,not ours !! well..come to think of it today..find that..eh..make sense !! haha..do u all agree ??

2004-07-11T13:00:00.000+08:00

just came back frm meng huan de training..i was LATE again !! haha..feel so bad lohz..called team to ask if they need me to play..at first she say no need but in the end i still played !! haha..sweat alot sia..the weather so hot..next week they got match against eastspring sch team..sure be there to support them !! haha...play quite badly today !! siian..career low !! i went to hang on the side bar den climb my way to the ring..ask doreen to pass me the bball and i DUNK !! haha..so fun..!! give me few more mths i no need hang on the side bar le..immediately jump and pull the ring liao !! haha..how i wish i there is sch BUT no teaching !! just go sch and socialise make frenz play but not study !! how i wish...wish and wish...

2004-07-11T00:53:00.000+08:00

wa si bei shack leh..just came back frm west plaza leg pain hand pain everyone pain all thanks to my ho peng yao JACKY NEO !! haha..no la..partly also because play bball until very tired lohz..very long nv play standard drop like fuck liao !! out of 10 shots..only score 2..cant believe it right..da ming ding ding de jesper how can only score 2 out of 10 ? smthing must be wrong !! haha..of coz la..so long nv play of coz will become lousy le la !! tired and played my very best le but still canot perform well..think i let my teammates down..haiiz..nvm la..my skill will slowly pick up de !! definitely will...

2004-07-10T14:11:00.000+08:00

so siian !! nth to do now !! aarrgghhh...now only 2.10pm !!! so early..do what fuck !?!? HUO YING ROCKS !!! anyone interested in playing baskebetball friendly match pls contact me..

2004-07-10T00:29:00.000+08:00

YEA !! touched basketball again !! so happy !! but now i so lan liao..haiiz !! my mother told me no dinner today..and knowing that mao and jac will be in tam i decided to go meet them..went 201 meet them..had MAC and left for bball..saw hong cheng on the way there..didnt really recognise him at first until jacky said his name..den i confirm is him !! so many people today lohz..got CHINA people..got malay people..den got our grp..the malay hor..alot leh..got 20+ i think..so many..but dont care la..went to shoot some balls..u noe what ?!?! AIR BALL !! haha..slowly my ball start to touch the ring..den finally..my form is back !! but not as zhun as last time liao..nvm..slowly will come back de !! had 4 on 4 with phillippines..won the 1st set by abit..lost the 2nd..and nv finish the 3rd coz the malays wanna play soccer liao !! it's their day...bobian !! went 'DINOSAUR PARK' to play bball..there also got people play soccer but not as many la..so we heckcare..we play..actually hor suppose to be 5 on 5 serious game de..but dunno why..suddenly become AND1 game..everyone was playing one man show was playing ally hoop and doing fanciful tricks..so fun loh !! so long nv have so much fun liao..the philippines also very funny..nabei..didnt expect them to be so humorous as well !! well..it was worth watching the mixtape chee yao send me..coz i did some of the tricks today and i succeed !! so happy lohz..haha !! our bball team hor..also plan to buy jersey le..FINALLY !! im waiting for this day..choose 9 as my number..the number doesnt matter..it's the SKILL that counts !! haha...tml will be playing 5 on 5 full court with phillipines..sure would be exciting !! time pls fly faster..fly fly fly !!! looking forward to the match...

2004-07-09T16:50:00.000+08:00

hey ive mastered the skill of folding flower le !! feel so happy loh !! had a great sense of achievement in my heart..i dunno why i like it so much but all i noe is it keep folding and folding !! so fun !! now hor me practising the heart one..weiiz..this one not easy hor !! not one heart only is 3-in-1 de !! got one big heart in middle accompanied by 2 smaller heart at the side !! gop alot of origami paper frm carline..so weekend can do !! den monday hor distrubute to class..those closer to me wan la..not all !! hohoho !! santa claus hor !! today when i give out the flowers i made yesterday..i feel like santa claus leh..walk ard the class with those flowers den throwing those flowers on the table..den they all look at me with a shocked face..den i say give u all wan laz..den so many thank you !! i feel so happy !! really felt like santa..but i too skinny to be one la !! haha..singapore version de santa..anyway i jus wanna see smile on my frenz..coz o level apporaching ma..den sure stress de..so made those flowers for them..hope will help or smthing lohz !! maybe can be a token..a memory of me..when we all graduate !! haha..when they look at the flower..they will REMEMBER me !! haha !! no la..made for them no motive de la..most importantly is to see them smile loh !! haha..well i did !! so happy...

2004-07-09T16:36:00.000+08:00

today in sch si bei song arh !! go sch like nv study at all..1st three period is A.maths..went hall cause i drop ma..den after den 2 period E.maths also do nth..do siglap paper only..after recess one period of chemistry..the bald head was kao bei here kao bei there time also up liao..den next is mother tongue also do nth !! i fold flower for sabrina..also taught her how to do..she say it was fun !! me too !! haha..last period is home room..that botak lim again..come in and den complain abt the table arrangement..he say he dont like we pair up den want us to sit individually..want us to seperate our table den hor this is the 1st time our class so united..whole class hor..like deaf like that..he ask us seperate our table..me continue folding my thing..john continuing talking..the rest behind keep playing..botak lim scold and scold but no one just bother abt him..until he finally shouted.." IF YOU ALL WANT TO PLAY THIS GAME I WILL PLAY WITH U ALL..IM STUBBORN " den i say back " SO ARE WE !! " den he look at me..lan pa pa lan..nth to say..den look away !! he hor..dunno ask us to seperate how many times liao..think frm last yr till now ba..but hor..we everytime after he leave..we sure move back !! haha..he also canot do anything !! den he told monitor to inform other teacher HE SAY CANOTY PAIR UP !! den i say back again..U DONT ACt BIG LA !! haha..think he nv hear me !! he very chee bye wan leh..like to pick on me,john and keith !! nabei..today spotcheck hair hor..he check me keith and john..the rest behind hor he all dont check !! fucker wan leh him..he ask me cut my back..i told him i got PERSONAL barber no need sch barber..he say give me until monday i say han na han na..when u have HAIR den i go cut mine !! haha..so funny !! die also will not cut !! unless his hair is as much as mine..if not FAT HOPE !! saw one of my cutest fren in the canteen..her eyes red red so i predicted she cry..but i manage to make her smile abit la..den promise make flower for her also..when i finish i canot find her..lucky saw her fren..den tolong her help me pass to the cute fren !! hope she like it !! after sch actually wan play soccer de but so hot..i stand only hor..sweat like fuck liao..so decided to go fold flowers lohz..haha !! john say i walk into AH GUA world liao !! haha..so what ?!!? how many boys like me can fold this kind of origami thingy ?!!? SAY LA !! haha..had physics lesson after sch..didnt even pay attention at all..was folding my origami all the while..think i addicted le !! suppose to do experiment but all i do was COPY !! haha..manage to survive the boring lesson and made my way home !!

2004-07-08T18:22:00.000+08:00

today so tiring !! i have been having headache for consecutive 3 days le leh !! what is wrong ?!? today CME lesson very funny..we went computer lab den hor all the com very gd wan la..peizhen told me got msn so i logged in..den john logged in..follow by keith..den alot people also start to log in BUT hor..teacher keep walking around leh..nabei..den hor ppl keep talking to me den the box keep popping out..this msn is the old version ma..canot close the popping box..have to wait de..wa lan !! the box hor..rise until very high leh..i must use my CME bk to act blur..reading..cover the stupid boxes !! john keith they all also like that..so fun loh..very challenging !! haha but in the end she found out den du lan..ask us go back class..go back class also nv do anything..but hor i learn to fold flower leh..saw geraldine they all folding..den winna also noe so she taught me !! me fast learner leh..haha !! folded 2 for denice coz today her bday !! after sch went canteen to wait for bday girl..sang songs for her..eat half a pizza den went for my O LEVEL oral leh !! si bei gan jiong leh !! me 2nd candidate leh..the passage ws easy like fuck..think is primary one standard..but hor the ri chang hua ti hor...diff like fuck leh !! think i die !! they ask me dian zi you jian (emailing) and an 100 yr old couple doing volunteer work..wa kaoz !! i was like...WHAT THE FUCK !?! but bo bian..die die also must say smthing out..did very badly la..!! dont care la..already done le..next i went back class for my eng mock exam..the passage also very diff leh !! dont even understand what they trying to say..discuss with john and keith answers and finish it quite earlier den some of them who started earlier den me !! hmm..today finally talk to her..but actually canot really consider talk to her la..handed in my paper to her..den wanted to take it back..actually dont wanna ask her de..want to take back without talking to her..but as i was trying to find my paper she looked up ma..den i say " i want take back my paper " den she just say " take loh " den i take liao..when i want to return i nv say anything also..just put back at her desk !! didnt expect grace to wait for me..went back together with john xinwei sabrina edwina and many more la..we didnt tok much..that's all for today !! there is smthing hor..in my heart..i want to say but i just cant recall..dunno what the hell is that..wait till i xiang dao le den post again..

S500 SUCK !!!

2004-07-07T20:46:00.000+08:00

wa lao..my phone hor..nabei make me fucking du lan leh !! for samsung phone hor we have to log in to the stupid and lame website to accumulate points in order to download ringtone..den each time we log in is one point ma..me hao bu rong yi got 100..so decided to go download phua chu kang de ringtone..after i download hor..my points remain there leh..last time got one incident also like that..den i download like siao..the points nv deduct den i got so many ringtone..so now i did the same thing ma !! what the fuck !! dunno why hor..can only receive one..the rest hor..they show me INVALIDATE PIN !! what the fuck is invalidate pin ?!?! what the hell is wrong with this fucking and useless phone ?!?! canot even go gprs download ringtone..whenever i want download hor..they will say dunno what shiit..page not found..error la..all sort of rubbish la !! den told my father hor..he also nv do anything to help me..all he say was..aiyah dunno la..dont care !! HUH !?!?! excuse me ?!?! like that only arh ?!?! nabei..feel like chagning phone leh..but NO MONEY !! still owe alot people money..wa kaoz !! for those who used to be crazy over s500 but did not get the chance to buy..dont worry !! u all made the right choice..u all will not regret coz this phone really SUCK TO THE CORE !!

2004-07-07T20:35:00.000+08:00

nth special happen today lohz..everything was normal !! but i did smthing that that i couldnt beliveve i actually did that..it was after sch ba..had maths lesson..den previously played soccer with wei lun and benson at the field so was sweating like fuck so i decided to borrow tissue la..i saw one packet on my fren'z table so i ask for a tissue frm her but she say is another fren de..nvm la just take la she sure will give me de..den wipe finish liao still sweating ma so i ask the another fren if can take the last piece not..den she say is not hers leh !! she say tissue is "HERS" den hor the 1st thing that came to my mind is put back the tissue and find tissue somewhere else..i dunno why i put it back la..i nv hate her..im not angry with her..i just dunno why..my hand just automatically threw the tissue paper back on the table and went toilet to get tissues !! i dont mean anything..but..i also dunno how to explain la..just feel so weird..we seem so stranger !! we used to be great frenz..we last time not like this de..haiiz..dunno why all this is happening ?!?!

2004-07-06T19:37:00.000+08:00

shld i really give up on her instead of everything especially my darhdarh ?!?! but now im giving up not because of her..im giving up cause im really very tired..i dont have the strength and energry to provide love for you..now i have to cope with sch stress..got to pull myself up frm the setback..got to do alot of things..with the energy i have now..haiiz..it's really a very tough decision...

2004-07-06T18:23:00.000+08:00

wa today hor sch life si bei siian leh..first 2 period physics can make me sleep liao..after that went it room for 2 period of eng..haha !! so funny leh..we suppose to go dictionary.com ma den find words that we dont understand in the passage den hor i go type the word 'fuck' leh..haha..come out so many meaning loh !! got one adjective is..what the fuck are u doing ? haha...den later i go type 'bastard' den got alot of stupid meaning also...got motherfucker got son of a bitch den suddenly i turn behind TRACY was looking at my com and she scream !! haha..so funny !! after that go back class for paul lee lesson...so siian !! nabei..but time pass evry fast la !! after recess slack like hell man..2 period of chinese which is equal to free period and 2 period of assembly..chinese hor me and john very chee bye leh..we actually in A class de but we went B class but today hor B class teachin den we run back to A class..haha !! den assembly went hall for youth day celebration !! quite siian la the performance but the atmosphere ard me quite interesting !! haha..starting the dance hor..okok la..quite funny but not very well organised !! den next hor is dance by maths science and humanities department...this part hor..wa i shout like fuck !! haha..coz paul lee hor he lead the dance ma..den beside him is a female teacher den got one part hor...he shake his butt very close to the female teacher..the 1st thing that come to my mind is : " PAUL !! I WILL TELL UR WIFE !!! " haha den everyone ard was laughing...shouted " LOO LOO LOO !! " as well...haha !! melvin tan was dancing like so not natural lohz..maybe he shy la..but looks a bit retarded though...haha..ssshh !!! the next performance abit siian alos...tracy was singing !! AGAIN !?!? she sing EVERY YEAR de leh !! not siian arh ?!?! haha...last one hor is not performance..we have to identify the teachers by looking at their baby photo..den got this pic hor..they hint is chemistry teacher...me john and keith straight away shouted BOTAK LIM !!! haha..so shiok !! he canot do anything also..lan pa pa lan..haha !! den last part they sang song together den end le..before they left..we wanted to shouted botak lim again but as we were gathering people hor..US go shout leh..wa lao..POSER !! haha..but in the end we all still got shout !! haha..got lesson after sch..social studies and geography..before social studies i go play bball ma...dont noe why hor..after that when i went for social studies lesson i got serious headache leh..dont feel like doing anything !! when mr.sim say do part (a) can le i was like happy liek fuck lohz..so gd coz my head really very pain !! geography was a boring one..alsmot fell asleep..but ended early la..hmm...stop here le la..so hungry..wanna go find smthing to eat !!

longest post ever : the inside of me

2004-07-05T19:42:00.000+08:00

i dunno how to start i have so much to say but whenever i want to say i just dunno how to phrase it out i very much wanted to let people noe how i feel but i just dunno how !! there is this mixed feeling stirring in my heart as im feeling sad,disappointed,remorseful,tired and many more !! i feel like cry out loud but my tears just cant flow out i feel like going to the beach to shout out loud i feel like giving up on everything !! actually alot of things had happen to me..esepcially recently i had a terible setback when i found out smthing that made me feel so lost !! never would i expect a news like this will fall upon me..i was like " what the fuck i do ?" felt really miserable !! true i defintely need a confider and a listener now but whoever i choose to be my listener depends on the situation !! if my situation wil hurt my friendship or relationship with my listener i would rather not let him or her know..definteley not !! i dont think anyone can understand the situation i am in and it's not because i dun wanna let them noe but it's because they are not me !! everyone has different characteristic and personality and how in the hell would u understand someone else situation just by hearing what's wrong ? maybe my stubborness is due to my horoscope ba..aries ppl tend to be more stubborn and this stubborness is not just a few words " change it" or "kick the habit" will solve the case !! this phrases will not make my stubborness go away and it's defintely not easy to do so !! if thats my character..let it be !! why shld i change it ?!?! im not as strong as everybody thinks i am !! i may be look strong but actually it's all appearance especially concerning relationships !! i feel evry tired...so so tired !! just feel like giving up everything on this earth !! i need time to be alone to have freedom to have peaceful life to forget somethings and someone to forget all unpleasent memories and this might take a long period of time !! dear im not giving up on u coz of her it's just that i really cant take it anymore !! my energy to continue everything has run out !! im feeling so stressed so pressurised !! not only relationships..my studies..my future...my everything !! it's making me mad !! dear im happy being with u coz u can make me forget her but it is only temporary !! whatever it is im really glad u were there for me when i needed u but im really sorry coz i cant hold on any longer !! i miss the carefree life i used to have i really miss the times i had when i was single when i was unattached !! i nv say i was unhappy when i have stead but perhaps this is not the right time to have one espceially when my o level is approaching !! i feel like finding someone in the streets and pick a fight with him..no matter i win or i lose i just feel like beating someone up..even if i was beaten up i will take it as a lesson to wake me up !! i feel like crying !! i really do..!! why do i have to know her ?!?! why do i have to fall in love with her ?!?! why am i attracted to her ? what in the hell is so special abt her ?!?! oh what the hell is wrong with me ?!?!? why are things turning out this way ? deari hope u dont mind what im gonna say next coz i think i will feel better typing it out and u will roughly get to noe what happen..if it hurts..im sorry !! everyone shld noe sec 1 and 2 i very beng right...alot of case like to fight scold here scold there small thing only i not happy liao..got a bull temper..sec 1 like to beat people like to give attitude to everyone including teacher nv think of the consequences for the things i ve done..sec2 become more beng..went for fights..temper was worst and i remember quarreling with mingmin and feishi !! almost fight..it's like i dont even care if the person is a girl or boy as long as the person makes me angry i will fight back !! den hor coz come out tiong hor will noe alot of ah beng and lian ma so i quite playboy loh got alot of chio girl den stead le break stead le break but most of the time i break..is not because i wanna change stead...there is a real reason behind it..very few ppl noe..is becoz of someone !! sec 2 end of year..we had streaming den split class ma den i went to see who same class with me..when i found out she was in same class with me i was like be able to fly..i cant wait for sch to reopen lohz !! when sch reopen..ive changed !! i stop mixing ard wirh those beng frenz i even delete their number in my hp i stop being so playboy stop being so irritating and bad tempered !! if those who noe me in sec 1 and 2 u all shld noe !! i tried to give out my very best to u i tried to present my very best to u i made a fool of myself just to see a short smile frm u i keep changing my appearance coz i tot u would like it i stop being beng coz i noe u dont like it i did everything for u !!
in the end i found out we cant be together..i admit to fate..so i decided to be frenz..just frenz..like anyone else !! i continue bringing the very best of me to u continue making a fool of myself but in the end..this is what i got ?!?! i dont wan to say it out..dont ask me also..i promiesd to leep in a secret i will do..anyone who go and ask her(if u noe who she is) will be going against me !! because of u i have also quarrelled alot of times with my deardear and our relationship is getting bad..im not expecting anything frm u..especially love cause i noe it's impossible i just want a simple friendship like anyone else had with you !! grace had gave me love that no one has ever gave me before and i really wanted to be with her bit i just dont understand why no matter how hard i try no matter how long i dont get to see u..it still fail !! here..im not trying to say that u are the cause of problem between the failing of my relationship with grace but i just wanna let u noe im really feeling very terrible now !! this is the 1st time i feel this..i dunno what to do ?!?! all i noe is keep running away frm the problem coz im scared !! some things are not as simple as u think..u might think that i planned everything i really did not !! and im not trying to get frenz ard u to spy on u or get info frm u but it's..i mean ur frenz can also be my frenz ma...i be close with them doesnt mean i wanna get info of u frm them right..some things just happened even without me knowing..i think u misunderstood that ba !! well whatever it is i really feel very tired very tired now..in a week..7 days..out of this 7 days im only happy for 2 or 3 days..the rest of it will be me thinking of the problems i have faced !! anyway for those who THINK that i SMOKE...im sorry to say u all are wrong..i DONT !!! i hope this will clear my bad impression among many of you especially her !! everytime my dear and me had arguement..it's usually abt the same thing and im very sick and tired of it !! ive been trying very hard for the solutions but i just cant seem to find the right antidote !! maybe a short break for me will do everybody good..it allows frenz ard me to stop worrying abt me especiialy my darhdarh..i noe its been hard on you..glad u were there for me..thnaks !! maybe it will be a period of time to sort out my thoughts a period of time to let me set my focus..set my target and aim on what i want to achieve !! perhaps it might be a blessing in disguise !! who knows ?!?!
maybe a break for me to focus on my o level and few months of busy working after graduating might brain wash my unpleasent memories..how i wish i can fly so i can fly away frm this place of misery and bring my happy memories with me !! now that ive type out what's inside me i felt so much better..although still got alot la but because my brother behind me keep kao bei say when am i finishin..so anyone who happen to pass by my blog..happen to read this long and naggy post of mine..hope u understand me bettr now..u might see me luffing here and thee cracking jokes but in my heart...there is a big wound waiting to be repair...

2004-07-05T18:49:00.000+08:00

no more playing le..holiday over fun over so canot play must study all the way liao le !! me this thursday o level oral leh so gan jiong..hope the examiner dont have a fierce and strict looking face if not me sure sure gan jiong like fuck de and hope the topic they ask hor also very easy..me tok cock can la but ask me tok serious matter hor my brain will totally black out de loh !! si bei gan jiong leh !! hope its a chio bu..!! wahahahahaha

2004-07-05T16:15:00.000+08:00

YAWN...
it's 4pm now and i just wake up only leh..so tired !!
yesterday morning went meng huan training..
wa the sky hor damn bloody hazy leh must be those
fucking indonesian burning the forest
told myself not to play bball de but in the end still
play den afternoon went home actually want slack de
but went out with my dear and jonas to tm to eat
mac den went pretty in toyko to take photo..
dear manage to get the euro tickets and is able to go
with me !!

we met the rest of our frenz outside sch at 9+..
everyone was carrying da bao xiao bao for the match
we had programmes before the match start..
i was at the bball court all the way
but i nv play la...go there shoot shoot ball only..
if i play hor they all can stand aside liao haha
patterson they all also got come back and play
haha quite fun la..coz i was ji siao-ing all the way
before going back to the hall i went ava to see
who singing..haha saw my dear and ppl suan me say i
noe how to play canon in de using piano !!
wad the hell man...noe i canot still say me !!
lian eh u want to tio liao izzit...haha
after we all went hall watch soccer le loh..
inside so cold so dark and the malay behind siao
wan like nv watch soccer before kao bei kao bu
but its ok la..if not very quiet also very siian
they made the atmosphere very exciting..
me hor usually dont watch soccer de ma den almost
fell sleep coz no goal ma..but the malays kept me
awake !! haha..cant sleep la..they too noisy le
finally during the 2nd half there was a goal by
greece and the first thing i did was to went to
find wei rong coz he bet 100 dollar on portugsl
haha the moment i go there i say gong xi fa cai
haha...he damn bloody du lan
anyway manage to finish watching the whole match
it was ard 5+ but we still canot go back yet
have to wait till 6.30 so i decided to sleep
i heard wei rong kept disturbing john and my dear
but i noe they playing de la..as long as they dun
too guo fen can le lohz..lucky they nv disturb me
woke up at 6.30 and i was blur like fuck
my contact lense so dry couldnt see anything
den gong gong left the hall..haha..damn blur
dear decided to take cab coz she lazy to take bus
since she pay den take la..haha bo bian coz i
really is broke to the max liao
reach home 7+ saw jonas still awake
went to have a shower den go pong pong liao

3 plus i wake up fucking blur also...tot still
early !! die got to study canot waste anymore
time le..

true yesterday i indeed was upset over smthing
but i dont really think it's time for u to noe
when the time is ripe..i will tell u
anyway thanks for accompanying me it really did
made me forget my unhappiness..
how i wish i have NEVER know her
too how i wish she NEVER exist
also but it's all too late...

2004-07-02T22:08:00.000+08:00

hello..here to blog again le !!
coz got SOMEONE hor keep complaining i nv blog say my blog siian...HOR !?!? WHO arh ?!?! haha erm nv blog for a few days le..coz nth special happen ma so never blog loh whereas today..erm
nth happen la but just blog la..haha am i mad ?!?! went home very early today no afternoon lesson leh reach home 1st thing msn liao..haha !! my dear went sch for mock exam so no one to tok to
me lucky got team and doreen !! they pei me tok cock especially doreen..think we talk frm 2 plus till 5 plus !! discussing abt horoscopes and stuffs... den after that she went offline le den i go play command and conquer general !! so fun ... although the game quite old le but still very fun leh play half way hang den du lan dont play liao went online tok to my dear loh.. actually me planned to study today de but dont know why no mood nv study at all... got la..got study one chapter of ss only loh !! den go eat den watch the kuai le yu that show siian la..actually today quite siian de !! siian until i do the thing that i hate the most... which is to pack my books..i pack those still want to use wan one side those dun wan to use de another side den put all my ten year series on my table as if im gonna do them all but dun think so la...haha hmm..used up alot of my brain juice racking my brain to come up with a touch decision..finally made it and it didnt disappoint her !! yyyiippee !! hmm...me now listening to music and chatting..waiting for my mouth to open big big(yawn) den can go slp le tml still have to wake up early for stupid o level listening...what a waste of time..anyhow do also can get 8 or 9 de..what the hell !! insult my talent leh go 45 min den can go home liao !! kaoz !! anyway all the best to everyone taking the listening tml although it is easy la !! heehee..

gaowei chalet

2004-06-29T23:04:00.000+08:00

just came back frm gaowei de chalet his bday today at aranda !! went ard at 6 like that starting quite bored coz dont know some of the frenz but slowly my mood picked up den i go crazy with them !! haha...we gamble tok cock play until 7 plus den we went down for bbq !! alot ppl leh think got 10+ or 20 ?!?! i noe alot ppl la after the bbq hor the fun come liao..gaowei is suppose to drink a alcohol mix with curry sauce and orange huice and chilli sauce,he really drank it !! i salute him..haha !! tok quite alot with my frenz den got some frenz very long nv see wan also tok quite alot no need really go bbq also got food coz got ppl bbq for me so shiok !! had foto taking at ard 9+ ba..den here comes the best part..there are candles in the cake and gaowei is suppose to take them out using his mouth when he is abt to take out the last one eveyone pushed his head to the cake !! it's so funny loh !! den u can see everyone running ard not wanting to get dirty,gaowei and his sai guan frenz took the cake and ran all over the place..we all ran as well they very funny leh they shout hor machiam the place no other ppl like that frm 1st floor shout till 3rd floor..haha they chase here chase there throw cake at each other...got one hor very jia lat he kena laksa and curry the sauce !! very suay leh...he wanted to makes us but we avoided him
heard they mess up the chalet room also at first no one dare to go up until when things seems to settle down den one by one all go up !! they say got ppl tiao dang but we missed it..by the time i went up the shen go back already !! hmm although i didnt really get involved in anything but had fun also la..we still got blast techno at the chalet !!so nice lohz..as if nobody business like that gaowei frenz seems fierce but actually very friendly especially the lao da and ben..haha..quite afraid of them at 1st budden got to noe them den had fun with them also too bad tml got
sch canot stay overnight there..nvm la..had fun can le anyway
gaowei..happy 17 bday !! have fun !!

1st day of sch

2004-06-28T18:17:00.000+08:00

*siian to the MAX*

today start of sch hor already very siian le why ? coz the fucking principal kao bei for so long leh..she and her 'always seems right but wrong' reasoning and NONSENSE !!! she wasted so much of my time my money my youthmy everything..just a piece of shiit !! den hor next time come the 'tot he is famous but actually unpopular like sai' de mr sam !! totally forget abt him until he came right up to me coz i was talking all the way when the principal is barking !! compromise here compromise there all is bullshiit !! dont tok abt those 2 idiots le next come the 'act got alot of hair but actually fucking bald' de mr lim !! he also another ass wan la say not happy with my slope..think he not happy i got more hair den him la !! chee bye..jealous say la den i shout at him say u not happy ur daiji im not going to cut !!fuck him la..over my dead body arh die also wun cut !! these 3 idiot spoil my mood totally

nvm la 1st 2 period a.maths i go library..inside so fun got so many joker..so funny !! tok to keith wiina doreen talk talk talk time pass very fast den went it room 2 for eng den i keep teasing tracy tan she sat go city hall whole class noe loh den she scold me hor i say the city hall thing again make her lan lan !! haha song gun !! hmm recess hor..went to eat malay rice..so long nv eat
suddenly feel that uncle food so nice os delicious haha den went bball court see clowns play bball again !! 2 period of hist and 2 period of mt den release le !! but got geo and pe after sch..geo is new teacher leh melvin tan..hmm gave us quite a gd impression on the first lesson make us feel that he can teach better than mrs lee feel that he can help pull us up frm the hole we fell in feel that he can help us score better grades so let's hope he dun disappoint us loh !! after that had pe..played mini tennis with john edwina and sabrina and some other frenz weather so hot run a bit only sweat like fuck liao but not bad la quite worth it coz had fun also loh !!

after that went WS with john and say MAO MAO !! he is a chee bye kia 1st day already pond tank sch liao what a notti boy !! went ntuc to buy sushi.. when abt to leave sae sabrina and edwina again
went to look for them in foodcourt popular den library den finally found them... had smthing to eat at foodcourt den chit chat there so funny loh..especially edwina so picky de !! eh..took same bus with edwina to tam jc den i alight den go home le..so tiring today !! hope tml will be better.. tml ?!?! nono confirm wun be better coz got MOCK EXAM omg..again ?!?! wa lan fucking siian !!

*tired*

*dearest_deardear! invadees!!

2004-06-27T21:47:00.000+08:00

JESPER YEO!!

hohohos! itz meeeeEee!! ur dearest deardear!! im invading ur blogg..noe whyy??cuz i miss uuuu sooo muchh!! hehees!! i don like skol!don wana go..cuz..if no skol.i can go ur hse everydayyy!den u can peii me!!come my hse play pianoo..i like to go skol..cuz can see u everydayy alsoOo!but..seldom see each other..but i like to go up to da 4th levl toilet..so can walk past ur class..den can see u !! heehees!!hahahas..!oh welLz..i really miss u soooo muchh..and i cant concentrate on anythiing.. bahhs..juz wana see u so muuch!!)): siggh!` lifez so toughh withoutt u!! i miss u..

I MISS YOU!!! I LOVE YOU!!
muaahs to u darhdarh laogong!! lovesloves!!
*opps..sorry for da uninvited invasioon((:

last day of bball during the holiday

2004-06-27T03:10:00.000+08:00

*yAwN*

today went ws to see doctor..no ppl de but the doctor very friendly today ws arcade so many ppl so decided to go in walk walk not alot of my frenz there la only saw ricky and some ji sam gina went to dear place for lunch or dinner ? haha dont know la only noe there got big feast best of all got CURRY !! my fav..after that went 760 to play bball lohz.. BUT suay suay saw a guy den i wanna tio wan..find him find so long den saw him today we decided to ignore him but he with fren ma so maybe wanna act sat sat come confront me..quite nervous though coz very very very long time i no dai ji liao a bit rusty they put time put place say tml 3pm at their zai dui ? fuck them why must their zai dui ? wu ji come 760 tok la hum arh ?!?! went 760 play bball..so long nv play hor i keep miss liao leh !!low..haha but slowly i picked back my skills again..played 5 on 5 with jacky fren den got one attack i qie den wanna shoot saw someone coming so i pump den FLEW pass him den shoot..CHOP !! haha so nice so happy...someone
shld have recorded it down den after that played 4 on 4 with
philipinnoes they very gd wan leh got one guy hor he very tall
den he can jump very high..he is like unstoppable !! den got one hor i ran to center to free throw line to take the ball den did a fade away..the unstoppable wanted to reject me but i fade away and hang release it to the board and CHOP !! hmm so proud of myself had a great sense of achievement.. haha told jacky abt the thing we msg the guy but he nv call think canot find ppl to settle den wan hide la hum ji wan !! tml sure put aeroplane de..anyway me water call full full liao they want come they can try...waited decade for them to call back at west plaza but they nv think they hum la..my fren tell me they sure put plane de !!hum ji still learn ppl put time put place pui !! anyway sch reopening le..dont create so much trouble la jes o level more imp..after o want be pai kai no one cares !! hahaha...

P.S : pai kia ?!?! nono...me is guai kia !! haha...

Horoscope of the day...(26/6/04)

2004-06-26T12:23:00.000+08:00

Aries :

Not everything will go according to your plans, but as long as you are adaptable you will do just fine. A little blip in a relationship you are involved in may cause some anguish.

mysterious ? secretive ?

2004-06-26T00:25:00.000+08:00

hello...anyone who is readin this blog now..
pls do me a great favour
vote at the voting corner,i have one qn to ask

Question : am i secretive ??

what are u waiting for ? VOTE NOW !! while stock last
haha im MAD !!!

totally disappointed...

2004-06-25T14:13:00.000+08:00

why must u hide ? if there is nth wrong between u and him what is there to hide ? the matter now hor is not whether i will sad anot loh !! if u tell me urself i will be sad but i will not blame u.If i find out myself i will be sad,angry and will surely blame u stead most important is honesty ma.. is it very hard ?does it mean u tell me it's guohong den i will leave u alone in outram park and go home ? will i ? but now that i found out myself..im really very disappointed all i want is honesty...u dont have to go thru so many things that time i still like lm i still pluck up my courage to tell u now this small things u also wanna hide frm me ?!?! i tell u the lm thing i also noe u will sad but i feel that honesty is very imp in a relationship...if i were to let u
find out urself that i still like lm i think u sure very angry wan loh but at least i told u myself !! u get my point ? im not wanting much frm u all i want is honesty !! i noe u dont want me to be sad i noe u had gd intentions but think again..hiding frm me and letting me find out myself makes me feel more disappointed den u letting me noe... seriously if there is nth going on between the two of u why must u hide it frm me ? why must u be scared ? dont u trust me ? is this how u have always been thinking ?? u said u did not want me to be sad..den u post in ur blog not scared i sad also mehz..!! anyway what's the diff ?!?!
i just dun get it...haiiz..feeling very disappointed !!

Horoscope of the day...(25/6/04)

2004-06-25T13:07:00.000+08:00

Aries :

You will not impress someone you care about by being blatantly honest. Show a little compassion and give him or her the benefit of the doubt.

Hmm...does it apply to my situation ?!? well hope it does...

bad day today...

2004-06-25T01:39:00.000+08:00

went out with my dear today...
hmm...dont know is a good day or bad la but had some fun went to cut my punk hairstyle first before meeting her at tam mrt platform at 3.30 funny thing is she dont even know where the hell is the front cabin and where is the back ? think she know now le
first we went outram park..hmm didnt know where to go leh we anyhow walk walk walk la..den walk until chinatown there wa lan regret going there so damn bloody hot !! haha not the place not gd..perhaps its just the fucking weather ba !! hmm ate alot of things leh... first i bought chilli fish ball..very nice leh !!
ho-e-shi !! wahahahahaha.... den went to one air con place..bought this cup corn !! very nice also..now den i know there got so many nice food !! hmm still bought ka chang puteh and you tiao !! so nice..nv really regret going la jus the stupid weather den hor me today still do charity leh..haha pay 5 dollar for dunno what crayon colour pencil thing but didnt want the thing so just donate 5 dollar as donation after that we went suntec..saw this adidas shirt gan chio !! the price even more chio 59.00 leh !! wa kao !! dont know must save how long den can buy recently bo lui leh after that went auntie anne to have a drink den went to fountain !! haiiz skip this part la..smthing unpleasant occur dont wish to say spoil my mood only den after she come my hse dont know do what...at suntec told me she wan go home den in mrt say come my hse dont know what the hell she
thinking played downtown hill with my brother...bike wan wa lan eh si bei suay leh keep knocking into things wan play liao zhok du lan !! but had fun la... hmm...the rest of it dont wan say liao... say liao spoil mood again !!

hmm...today arh...not bad la had fun loh but only thr early part of the outing today !! the rest of it..erm..not that pleasant la !! when can i go out like this again ?!? let's see...most probably after my o ba !! dont think will be so free le lohz...

Horoscope of the day...(24/6/04)

2004-06-24T15:17:00.000+08:00

Aries :

You won't have any trouble finding a position that suits you today. Go for interviews or talk about your ideas and what you need help with to make your dreams come true.

sch reopening le...

2004-06-24T02:57:00.000+08:00

hmm is it a good thing that sch reopen or is it bad ? both good and bad also have la good hor is can see my frenz again...can tok cock can play together..so fun loh !! den hor also no need everyday think want to go where coz confirm need to go sch de ma..
also hor go sch can save money never go out chiong go out have fun go play pool hor can save alot of money leh...si bei song !!
ehz..best of all is can thrash those basketball weaklings in sch..haha !! abit chee bye hor me but they really VERY LAN WHAT !! haha...actually they ok la not bad but play with them smtimes will abit siian maybe i used to playing with adults haha no offence la... bad hor is must STUDY loh !! what else..den must see the discipline master face..must cut hair !! u noe hor my hair hor the behind keep until damn long liao leh but tml have to go cut short..stupid wan leh !! why sch cannot have long hair ? long hair can also be neat wan..kanasai wan leh sch system !! den hor must do so many homework den also got so many mock test..noe why ? coz o level coming liao ma..bo bian have to chiong last yr chiong finish den song gun liao !! no need see all those stupid texstbook again... si bei siian wan leh see that bloody sam coz he think he very big he very pro..pui !! cane ppl still so many post sai wan leh he den always want act fit always run in the
evening !! got one time we sit down den he come tok to me and my fren den he say he young that time how sat..fuck him la pui !! say he tkd black belt say until very gd...den when he turn back wanna leave he was able to siam A FEW drops of water only den he want action say he very agile...pui !! chew him !! cant stand him..prefer mr singh leh !! he so funny...haiiz bo bian..tahan 6 more mths den can le but i will miss my frenz...all my frenz in coral !! hope by den we can still keep in touch... pls dont forget me..a fren like me hard to find wan heehee :P it would be such a waste to lose a fren which is 99% cute 95% friendly 92% kind 90% loving and 100 % humorous !!give face abit dont vomit..let me hao lian a bit haha !! so tired want go orh orh le..
n-I-t-E !!

2004-06-24T02:53:00.000+08:00

it's just a photo hao bu hao..whats more we also nv do anything ma !! just take photo only.. told u how many times i just treat her like my younger sister only ma as u noe my siblings all boys de den i wish i can have a younger sister now that i found one le..dont like that la.. dun jealous...oops ?!?! can i say it out ? haha... anyway u just got to trust me !! i treat her only like a younger sister of mine !!

*phew..

cant get to sleep

2004-06-23T07:41:00.000+08:00

wa lan eh now hor 7.42 am i already wake up le leh u noe what time i sleep not..i 5 plus den sleep leh it's not that im not tired but its my stomach when i lie down hor i feel like shitting and urinating but when i went to the toilet..NOTHING comes out wan leh wa lan waste of my time wan loh !! den i got back to my bed den the feeling come again den i go toilet...nothing AGAIN !! wa i canot tahan liao so i dont sleep liao but..but i VERY TIRED LEH !! what to do arh ??

Horoscope of the day...(23/6/04)

2004-06-23T07:40:00.000+08:00

Aries :

There will be so much on the line at work. Your competitive nature will enable you to surpass what anyone else can do, but that won't be good enough if you aren't 100 percent on top of your game

2004-06-22T16:17:00.000+08:00

today went out with my fren..long time nv go out with her le today meet her damn gan jiong damn nervous dont know what to say to her leh ... but in the end got tok la still tok quite alot !!hmm...she late leh !! where got such thing wan.. usually is peope wait for me but today i wait for her haha nvm la later she cry..joking la !! :P went to mac..but damn bloody crowded den decided to go yoshi dunno what sai de also alot people !! what is wrong ? dont they have to work...ass !! haha den in the end went kfc to eat but i only drink not very hungry also..starting hor both very quiet den in the end tok quite alot la.. started playing her phone den hers got video recorder ma i go record her den make her disappear... she like so sua gu nv see before..haha no offence la !! den she hor rush rush rush..keep saying time pass fast but in fact she eat so slow de..actually wan take bus den in order not to CHIONG so she decided to take cab.. rich hor !! all the way to temasek sec leh.. she so funny..the way she eat the way she siam the camara canot tahan her sia !! after that we went to take neoprint..u noe what !?!?! she ask me to treat leh..bo bian i boy reject her abit abit no gentleman rite so treat her loh..8 dollar leh !! hmm...as i was not photogenic hor.. the photo come out all ruined by me so ugly de !! den suppose to draw the card ma...she ask me to decorate what the hell ?!? haha i very seldom go pretty in tokyo de dont even noe how to function the machine i even paste one heart in front my my face !! so sia suay she keep saying " it's so fun it's so fun " well is it really so fun ? haha..dont know la..shld be quite fun la coz 8 dollar leh !! not 80 cent leh..haha !! erm after that follow her go take cab den i go home le...

eh frm the last time i saw her..she change quite alot leh !! she hor..LOOKS taller than me but hor my height is taller than her leh !! she LOOKS taller only.. haha !! erm..she also more pretty le maybe coz she rebond her hair ba she also more sweet and cute !! haha.. one thing she nv change is she still like to ask people treat her !! that time still ask me treat her draw the thing outside toys r us that one..dont know she remember not !! :p hmm oh ya she still go change her name in my phonebook to *ahem haha shld i say ?!?! dont wan la later people shy..

hmm..whatever it is i really had fun with her,a younger SISTER that i am fortunate to have..so yuying
MEIMEI..keep in touch k ?
BROTHER and SISTER FOREVER !!

Can we really go back to the past ?

2004-06-22T16:09:00.000+08:00

hmm...just finish watching a show by zhen yi jian and zhang bo zi wan !! so touching leh... its about zhen yi jian and zhang bo zi going back to the past den dont know what la...hard to explain..haha !! but hor smtimes we see certain things hor like we see before or the thing actually happen before right... just now the show got explain why leh listen liao although dont really understand but quite make sense la !! they say we can be at different universe at the same time erm..smtimes why we see things like happen before hor is because we travel thru time without knowing it or what shit la..haha !! erm aiyah dont know how to phrase and explain leh..must see the show den know de !! ehz..but smtimes hor things that happen hor like already happen before le..dont know why will like that hmm..anyone ? anyone with scientific explanations ? haha think im mAD !!

Horoscope of the day...(22/6/04)

2004-06-22T16:08:00.000+08:00

Aries :

You will stand tall and be counted for your outstanding ability to make a difference. You will get along well with children and old folks alike today.

2004-06-22T02:36:00.000+08:00

heyhey...its so cool !! my blog got music worz..so nice !! but hor if can put techno lagi best la hor too bad only have limited song nia !! si bei sian leh... but not bad la can put wang xin ling de ai ni actually is put adam family de so funny wahahaahahaaha !! but deardear say this one better so i change loh i so guai hor !! haha...if can put pin guan and liang jing ru de ming ming ai ni also good !! the song so nice... whatever it is..im still CRAZY OVER PIANO !!!

crazy over PIANO !!!

2004-06-22T01:45:00.000+08:00

hmm..today went to my darhling hse go pei her haha actually say want pei her but my main motive is to go play her piano only !! wahahahaah... but want pay piano also canot... must entertain the babies first once enter the door only the baby will come kor kor den want me to bao bao them !! i go where they follow where but also quite fun la..also made me realise my talent in baby sitting !! wahahaaha !!! hmm all this not important la... at around 6+ the babies were finally gone and i can start on my piano !! song gun la !!! me just learn not long only my dear teach me de..she teach me canon in d starting learn damn hard...keep pressing wrong but today hor not bad worz !! all correct !! got talent hor !! dun play play hor... BUT hor got one thing gan du lan i just cant work out my left and right hand left hand suppose to play some notes right hand suppose to play some notes then both hor at diff speed and tempo leh !! wa kaoz !! damn hard to play leh !! but hor..i think i sure can de la... got talent leh..haha !! wait till i can play the song le hor must stage a concert !! ask the babies be my audience... whahaha siao hor... also dont know suddenly so mad over piano just feel that it's so fun !!

*piano siao*

Horoscope of the day... (21/6/04)

2004-06-21T13:25:00.000+08:00

Aries :

Take the initiative and network until you find someone who recognizes your talent. Today is really all about you and getting ahead in all aspects of your life.

2004-06-20T21:14:00.000+08:00

my jaw very pain ?!! u all wanna noe why... coz hor just noe when i sleeping i open my mouth big big ma...wa lan...dun laugh hor !!now si bei pain leh... this will teach u all a lesson... slp dont open mouth big big !!!

fucking weather

2004-06-20T20:43:00.000+08:00

hmm...weather today si bei hot leh... nabei made me bath so many times liao !! bath come out hor still feel sweaty sweaty de den i go slp adjust the fan blow me but when i wake up hor i sweat like fuck again !! what is wrong with the weather today ? chao chee bye !! feeling a bit headache now leh dont know is sick or just pure tiredness leh all i noe is my headache and the weather spoil my appetite spoil my mood spoil my everything actually want to do hw de den now no mood liao actually wanna eat de now not hungry liao can peope burning the forest pls stop the fucking burning process and destroy the ozone not !! nabei fuck all ur family arh... si bei hot u noe...burn burn burn !! now my temper also come liao... haiiz...must control must control if not many things will happen de !! breathe in...breathe out... breathe in...breathe out... how i wish my hse got air con den i can adjust to lowest temperate den go slp wa song gun leh !! now hor want do do hw also dont know go where do..my room got my siblings playing PS and com outside in living room my father watchin his F1
go kitchen...hot like fuck !! what the hell... feel like going to beach but damn bloody lazy i dont have mood to do anything except sleep now !! haiiz...hot... is there someone out there willing to let me whack for free ? pls inform me asap...
*gone crazy*

__-Strictly Restricted - SIN BOUNDARY - Strictly Restricted-__

since the day...

living in dream

good news..!!

bad news..

good news..!!

does it mean anything ??

so siian !!!

stupiid me...

what a WASTE !!

MISS ME !?!?

S500 SUCK !!!

longest post ever : the inside of me

gaowei chalet

1st day of sch

*dearest_deardear! invadees!!

last day of bball during the holiday

Horoscope of the day...(26/6/04)

mysterious ? secretive ?

totally disappointed...

Horoscope of the day...(25/6/04)

bad day today...

Horoscope of the day...(24/6/04)

sch reopening le...

cant get to sleep

Horoscope of the day...(23/6/04)

Can we really go back to the past ?

Horoscope of the day...(22/6/04)

crazy over PIANO !!!

Horoscope of the day... (21/6/04)

fucking weather

-Strictly Restricted - SIN BOUNDARY - Strictly Restricted-